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It requires an immense amount of vulnerability on her part to overcome these issues. First, she has to WANT to. If she wants to, then make sure you provide a safe and non-judging environment to SLOWLY help her cross her self-imposed lines. She think she's a bad lover and that nothing can make her better. If you push a small boundary, praise her for it, then wait a while until you try to push another, you might have success. She wants to know she is safe, won't be forced to do anything she's uncomfortable with, and eventually she open up (literally and figuratively). You have to be very patient and don't try to introduce a lot of new stuff in short order. If you do, she feel completely inadequate, and we are a total pain in the neck to deal with when our self esteem is in the toilet. Space it out enough so that she has time to get used to, and enjoy, the new activity, and she'll ease into it better. Also, if you make her feel beautiful, it reap you rewards. of us women have sex drive issues because we hate our bodies. I really feel for you. I wish I could apologize to my ex for being the same way with him. It was unfair to him and my fear and inhibitions helped kill our relationship. The sick humor of it is that the breakup caused so much stress I lost all the weight, look fabulous now, and am having superb sex (but am really poor!). real bbw looking
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