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The narcissist's guarded detachment is a sad reaction to his unfortunate formative years. Pathological narcissism is thought to be the result of a prolonged period of severe by primary caregivers, peers, or authority figures. In this sense, pathological narcissism is, therefore, a reaction to trauma. Narcissism is a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that got ossified and fixated and mutated into a personality disorder. All narcissists are traumatized and all of them suffer from a variety of post-traumatic symptoms: abandonment anxiety, reckless behaviors, anxiety and mood disorders, somatoform disorders, and so on. But the presenting signs of narcissism rarely indicate post-trauma. This is because pathological narcissism is an efficient coping (defense) mechanism. The narcissist presents to the world a facade of invincibility, equanimity, superiority, skilfulness, cool-headedness, invulnerability, and, in short: indifference. This front is penetrated only in times of great crises that threaten the narcissist's ability to obtain narcissistic supply. The narcissist then "falls apart" in a process of disintegration known as decompensation. The dynamic forces which render him paralyzed and fake his vulnerabilities, weaknesses, and fears are starkly exposed as his defenses crumble and become dysfunctional. The narcissist's extreme dependence on his social milieu for the regulation of his sense of self-worth are painfully and pitifully evident as he is reduced to begging and cajoling. At such times, the narcissist acts out self-destructively and anti-socially. His mask of superior equanimity is pierced by displays of impotent rage, self-loathing, self-pity, and crass attempts at manipulation of his friends, family, and colleagues. His ostensible benevolence and caring evaporate. He feels caged and threatened and he reacts as any animal would do by striking back at his perceived tormentors, at his hitherto "nearest" and "dearest".
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You need to read for time to figure out the people and the community values. I'm cranky and specific, and tend to be a hard-ass about language. The women who are regs here are all unique in their presentation of self and their perspective here; all have value. AxTx is an academic and far more patient and philosophical in her approach. You've sometimes missed her point entirely, and her tone, because you didn't lurk enough or read carefully enough to pick up on individual personalities—which is no easy thing to do in text only form. We have all kinds of women here as active participants; there's no monolithic way to interpret anything, at all, because each of us has different experiences and skills—and lives different kinds of lives. We have younger women, women who are poly, women who are bi, women who have grandchildren, women with, women working on conceiving. We have at least one member who lurks and rarely posts. I know about her because I once wrote about a fake lesbian blogger who was actually an American male graduate student and she contacted me. The way you presented those images was didactic in the extreme. You made assumptions about "right" interpretations and the reception of those images in a very top-down way. mature single in Sturza(damn computer geekery how can I resist) I found this awesome x-small form factor company the other day. I think when I replace my current desktop, I want one of these eensy green Linux machines: Smaller than a breadbox! sex webcam chat live
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