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I'd say it's time to put your foot down about this issue. It clearly bothers you (it would REALLY bother me.) Both of them are getting some kind of "kick" out of still being married. There is no other way to explain this behavior, each of them IS getting something out of it. Granted taxes isn't much a thrill but whatever. It's really weirdo that she would e-mail/ you but whatever And I bullshit on the having-to-do-our-taxes-together routine. I don't know what their financial entanglements are but I'm sure you don't have to file jointly even if you're married. I would make it abundantly clear that you have been more than patient in waiting for him to un-commit himself from this woman and now play time is over. It is time to choose your feelings over hers and for some reason you feel she'll be able to go on living divorced or not. I dare say your bf has quite the ego on him to think that she'll kill herself over divorcing him. You might want to point out to him the longer they are married the more of a stake she has in his assets. Also, I hate to say this, but are you sure he's not using his attachment to her as a way to avoid being able to commit to you (or anyone -)? He not even be consciously doing it just a thought. I think it's time for a real serious talk, what you are asking for is more than fair. All I know is that in my book "the one" would not be married to some one and if they were they would rectify the situation quick, fast and in a hurry. look for long term relationship
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