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but for a while one fall/-, I was playing around with my local tavern's, barmaid. She had a ton of issues, but I kind of have a sweet spot in my heart for her, she really liked me, like getting laid, wanted to explore sex a bunch, had her own list of stuff she wanted to try not just agreeing to what I wanted to do, liked drinking and watching football. Anyway, one drunken night at closing time, everyone had gone home a bit before. She was cleaning up, doing shots with me and we were openly discussing going home to fuck. I wanted to go home, sit in the hot tub, drink and get laid my personal fav. She brought up wanting to have sex on a pool table. Cool I have one of those too, let's go. No, the table in the bar. Well ok, it's not like we hadn't done it in the bar after closing time before. She told me she had a thing for pool tables and really like the cold pool balls against her warm/wet parts. More discussing got her to admit that a few times, after closing she was quite horny. She'd lock up and wank using a few drops of KY and a pool ball. Rotating it to a cool spot or switching it out for a fresh one. She said she always felt dirty and wrong for it and hurried out of the place afterwards. I asked if she used the pool cue for a dildo I got a wide eyed look and she said no. It was the no like "I want to, but I feel wrong enough as it is". A little coaxing, the idea of a condom over it and she was interested. She laid out on the table, I put a condom on the big end of the pool cue, she started wanking slowly with a pool ball. I could tell she'd done that more than a few times. I held the end and she slowly guided it in place, she was absolutely on the edge ready to cum. Still supporting the end, I touched her ass she snapped back from the edge. I asked her if she had thought of one in her ass too she quick said yes, but the big end wouldn't fit. I taunted her to try, she agreed quite quickly; but if it went I had to afterwards guess that was a fantasy too. A little warm up by her w/ fingers then me with fingers, reminding her not to cum yet. Slow, steady it went in. She didn't wait, she bucked against both, rubbing her clit, screamed and came for what felt like forever. For the few months after, my pool table at my house could have been our bed we had so much sex on it, she saw it and got wet. beautiful naked woman from Aldershothave lost a very dear grandmother this year. We were more like mother/daughter. It's been 7 months. Early on I went to a griefshare group at a local church( I was the only one their not to have lost a spouse,but I developed insight/perspective on my own marriage through the others in the group). Those who had lost spouses and shared with the group their feelings/thoughts/experiences since their loss said they found the group to have been a very healing and safe place to be, and through the weeks felt comforted by the group. There there are people who know what you are going through and those who have been where you are now or are going through it. People in your family want to rush you through your grief, but there is no timeline for getting through it. Nobody but you know the length of this journey ed grief. They say things intending to make you feel better, but their words are very hurtful instead. what you do have to do is move through grief and not get stuck in it. Take one breath at a time, one second at a time, one day at a time. You have had to deal with so much this year and I am so sorry for your losses and your health issues. My prayers go out to you. I suggest the death and dying forum, even if you just read what others post, you know you are not alone. Remember breathe date match
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