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I am a SWM (actually divorced recently, but still single, nonetheless), 44 years old seeking a long term relationship with a trustworthy woman. I am average height (5ft 7or 8inches tall) with an athletic body in very good shape and in fantastic health. I am a disease free, light, social drinker. I have kids that do not live at home, they live with Mom (whom I get along well with for the sake of the kids) I am a pretty great Dad. I am also financially stable, having a stable income. Due to my recent divorce and my desire to ensure that my kids do not do without, I have relinquished most of the marital possessions to the ex-wife and kids, as I make pretty great money and realize that there is much more where those possessions came from it will be easier for me to purchase those things than it will be for her to.
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Your spouse has to WANT to stop. The key is their inner motivation, their. An ultimatum imposes rules from the outside; it does nothing to address the lack of motivation on the inside. Bottom line: although giving an ultimatum feels good, it misses your target. Your target is your spouse's inner motivation. And how do you affect someone's inner motivation? The secret is to CONNECT with them. Let me explain. Life begins as a connected experience in the womb of our mother. When we're born and that physical connection is severed, we yearn to connect again. How we go about creating that connection and how well we succeed becomes the story of our life. People who make and meaningful connections with other people feel happy and fulfilled. (Research proves that the single most important factor that determines happiness in life is CONNECTEDNESS.) People who lack a real emotional connection with others grasp at anything in an attempt to fill that void in their life. That's what leads people to sex, alcohol, hours of mindless TV, falling in over and over again with new people, or an obsessive commitment to money, success, work, or a hobby. These trappings offer a MOMENTARY filling. But the cause of the emptiness your spouse seeks to fill is a lack of a meaningful CONNECTION in their life. When you create that connection with your spouse, you accomplish two profound things. First, you eliminate your spouse's for their destructive behavior. You take the wind right out of its sail. You cut it off at its source. They don't need it anymore. There's no more hole to fill. YOU filled it! Second, you offer your spouse a permanent filling for a hole that's been insatiable probably since their childhood. (Your spouse's destructive behaviors can probably be traced back to a disconnected relationship they had with their mother or father). And their for your connection, a REAL and LASTING filling of that hole, trump any momentary interest in seductive pleasures. So how do you get your spouse to stop their destructive behavior? You create a connection with them. Now here's the kicker. The chances are very good that YOU have no clue how to deeply CONNECT with your spouse. ladies for sex Concorddue to the Patriot Act and creation of Homeland Security NEVER come back, get over it. Tell me something I don't know. You better get a real reason for denying your a passport. If you go to court with that rap the judge hand you your ass, on a platter while he laughs you out of court. That I guarantee. You can appeal all you want, but you lose. nsa friends
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