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you are not crazy to think that you can restore trust. You are just overly hopeful and unrealistiy optimistic. This is no condemnation of your hopefulness, just my 30+ years of experience with a diagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder sufferer. During the last disasterous 4 years of marriage, my Ex lied (almost daily) about how her "counseling" was going. A few days before seperation she finally acknowledged that she had quit counseling over 3 years prior because it was "just too hard". Mind you, we had been in "marriage counseling" for about of our marriage, and I finally decided that "she" needed individual psychotherapy (to which she agreed), otherwise, I'd divorce her. During that last 4 years she made several scary and witnessed attempts on my life (besides the run-of-the-mill domestic violence perpetrated by her, and in addition to the infidelities, lies, accusations, and general victimhood routine). Just sayin' if this all has you twisted out of shape and indecisive, take a few dozen hours to research BPD. You find that you are not alone in your grief. There's a book ed "Walking on Eggshells". If your stbx is truly BPD, you find that the book was written directly to and for you. There is a workbook to help you overcome the personality traits that allowed you to become enmeshed in a relationship with a BPD sufferer. And there are also workbooks for you and your attorney when you decide to "Split" or divorce from a BPD sufferer. And if you think things were complicated during marriage, just wait until you actually pull the plug on the relationship! You ain't seen ugly yet. sex partner Mount Shasta
a severence package and maybe even some job counseling to help you transition. If not, file for unemployment right away. Most states require a waiting period of at least a week where you do not get paid and then you have to wait for another 3-4 weeks before you get your first check. Get to work right away updating your resume, posting it and networking. Try to avoid head hunters as they leave you feeling exploited, in my opinion. If you do choose to go that route, make sure they are not sending your resume out to companies that you do not appove of before hand. I have lost out on a job because I had 2 competing agencies fighting for their fee and who sent my resume first. Looking for a job can be a full time job and you can't afford to be passive about this now. You don't know how much time you have before you find your next position, so try not to focus on the sucky aspect of this and move forward now. As much of a walking disaster I feel like right now, at least I am not looking for a job on top of it. (crosses fingers). Good luck! on line dating Culver City CaliforniaMy job at a college was eliminated going in to the new fiscal year last July. The longer you are on the shelf, the less attractive you are to an employer. I decided to apply to grad school and I got in to a top program, but now it be over $30, in student loans plus living expenses. I am writing to a lot of foundations asking for scholarship assistance and we how that goes. I'm really not in a position to take out massive debt and I'm not sure my job prospects on the other end are going to be any more enhanced after two more years out of the workforce. wants men
horny women Cincinnati bend that you are overanalyzing the word "settle". It is just a word and maybe if you can change your mindset to the some other word, such as maybe compromise it might help. To settle makes one think in a negative way, in a way that things could always be better. However to compromise implies that you, yourself are getting something out of the situation. And each situation is unique. In a relationship you cannot keep score. So what that he gives on 2 big issues, that does not now mean you have to give on 2 big issues of his. When you are truly in you want to compromise. I understand there are some issue that you cannot compromise on, and we each have our own set of issues. I am still not really sure what the issue is that is giving you so much grief. Is it the smoking? If so like someone mentioned earlier that is an addition and it take effort on his part to give it up. I am more concerned with is to give up wanting to be a parent because you don't want to be one. That is a big issue IMHO to give up. My SO and I tend to agree on all the big issues. However, I am having to learn how to compromise on the smaller issues. desperately seeking uber busty
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