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I wish that when I was and dumb and living far from home with the who would become my first husband I wish would've been around back then. There were so red flags. So hurtful incidents, so times I almost left him. Instead, I married him, had two sons with him, and finally divorced him 16 years later. But it was not a happy marriage, and while there were some good times, the boys saw plenty of bad times and dysfunction at home. I'll tell you what my counselor told me when I discovered I'd married a whore. I married a pig. Now, some folks fancy pigs. They hug 'em and clean 'em up and take 'em to the fair, and dress 'em up nice. But at the end of the day, a pig is a pig, and it is in its nature to wallow in the mud. Not only that, but pigs crave the companionship of other pigs. So unless you fancy standing on guard for the rest of your life, this is not the guy for you. From everything you've said? This is not the guy for you. Let your pig go, let him wallow. You'll hurt for awhile, but be much better off in the run. hottest wifes HelenaTranslation: "I'm going to sit here and think of absolutely zero and not be touched or talked to because I am about to SCREAM from little fingers and little voices pulling and yammering at me all day -!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I agree with all the other women here: Men want to fix things. Women sometimes just need to talk it out. It's genetic, and it's one of reasons why men and women get so frustrated with each other. Both actions are equally valid, but when you're wired one way, it's hard to understand the way the other is wired. (Sometimes you have a couple where the roles are reversed that's always interesting :-) A couple of things come to mind: 1. Preschool. It doesn't have to be League, but a preschool/Mother's Morning Out program a couple of mornings a week for the 2 year old be a HUGE help for her. The other option is perhaps joining or starting a babysitting coop with other mothers of, where people agree to trade babysitting services among themselves. (We had a great one in our neighborhood 20 or so years ago, you joined for $10, got 10 coupons worth hour each. If you watched someone's, you were paid in coupons that you could, in turn, use for babysitting from someone in the coop.) 2. If the housekeeping is overwhelming for her, perhaps she never learned how to keep house efficiently. With this age, she's going to have to lighten up a bit on standards. Point her towards , which is a tremendous resource on breaking down overwhelming household tasks to regular manageable bites. Reassure her that you value her sanity more than you value a clean sink. 3. Consider starting to schedule date nights once a week. Extra brownie points if you arrange for the babysitter, too :-) Just tell her that you want to spend time with HER a movie, a nice dinner out, holiday shopping heck, if you're near the ski areas, take her for an evening ski session when you get enough snow! 4. Consider a cleaning service that comes in once a week or twice a month to do the deep cleaning. She sounds a little overwhelmed, and you sound like a very caring husband. mothers today are so much more isolated than they used to be from neighbors and families it's hard raising in a vacuum. best free online dating site
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