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Yet the reality is her lovers give her more intense sexual than I do. When I say this I mean it purely on sexual level. One thing this life style has taught her is how to compartmentalize her sexuality and sexual pleasure. She has the ability to separate sex from and understands that her lovers are for sex. Yet when they are together, the power of their sex is so real and raw. Our sex is loving and intimate and wonderful. Their sex is powerful and deliberate and epic. I know it sounds odd, but the course of their relationships has been much like a heavyweight boxing match. Two finely tuned athletes first feeling each other out and then eventually standing toe to toe, delivering blow after blow, challenging the other give rise up and find their best, finishing the match totally spent and exhausted. Being a part of it for me is a thrill. I her so dearly and seeing her realize the fullness of her sexuality in the context of our marriage and the pleasure that has brought to both of us is nearly beyond description. And being able to share intimacies, and kink with her on my own right is a in and of itself. Yet in the midst of all this, sex and kink, I'd be lying if I didn't recognize a certain amount of uneasiness, nervousness perhaps even anxiety. I'm thrilled she's so fulfilled but why can't I be the one who provides it? What if I were capable of giving her THOSE kind of orgasms? don't get me wrong, I'm far from saying that I'm ready to reign things back in a more monogamous fashion. And I have shared these concerns with her and she gets it. She is very sensitive to my needs. We spend a lot of time cuddling and talking, sometimes immediately after they've finished fucking. This has been great. The only thing we haven't talked about is ending the lifestyle and going back. I'm not saying I want that. If I did I'd feel comfortable saying it to her. Yet at the same time I just feel like, in ways, the dye has been cast. There is no turning back. I'm not sure now our relationship could withstand it. I guess this has been an extremely way of me asking a very simple question. For those involved in this lifestyle, have you experienced this feeling I've described? Of wanting all this for your spouse, yet at the same time being somewhat conflicted by it? looking for a lonely or neglected wifeThere is no right answer to when each person moves away from There isn't There isn't some magical amount of time for anyone to touch her, that comfort you, give your blessing to her. Did you envision her at home sad and lonely, numb, a recluse looking through some box of memories and crying over old, for you ? You had years. Somewhere in the future you be with some other woman, you'll be intimate with her You not think of that old' relationship at all You might do it out of spite, anger You might do it for lust, or the effects ( excuse ) of alcohol. The time of having sex with this newer woman, to you, feel like a step of right timed, honest connection and moving onto a mutual exclusive romantic commitment to the other You can't judge her or live in the guessing game of control or bitterness with her, or judgement of her actions or emotional choices. She has years of influence and memories with you for better, worse, for changes, etc., Be graceful, wish her the best as you would wish her, for caring for you as well. In some time in the future, you her again Maybe you have the communication tools to be able to talk over what could have been different for the two of you, or a simple conversation and an honest exchange or real happiness, that they are okay, are good, have grown. Time, takes time girls sexuality
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