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the only thing to add is perhaps to not forget about instinct. If there's an inclination to dominate then hopefully there's some instinct there to work with coupling this with a mentor is a great way to go about it. Attend as local munches and education sessions as you can. Nothing can replace practical experience but watching others do is second best until you gain your confidence and learn the safety side. Fetlife can be a good resource for delving into events in the local scene. Hanging around subs helps too because you learn common themes toward what they seek on the cerebral side while you've got someone to mentor you through the mechanics and physical stuff. There are tons of reading resources out there too as usual I'll toss out the Topping Book. need a fwb for ltrhouse but you need to understand the term separate equity and how it might apply in your case. That is if it can be shown that you used separate property to put toward the home at the time of purchase. How that applies varies by state so I'd discuss that with an attorney. You might be surprised that without his name on the deed, mortgage or title and downpayment from separate property he might not be able to force a sale unless you can't handle the finances. You should be safe with the separate property (money) but again, don't base your decisions on the 'should' be it's important to KNOW. You could be % right, but you want to KNOW you're right. I think the main misconception you have is really the for a low drama divorce but you kind of know that. Chances are this isn't going to slip quietly along, you'll have to stand firm and stay calm against some attacks that hit you at your core and character. Even with logic and law on your side..don't expect him to follow along, plan on him NOT following and if he does, take it as a bonus. don't try to predict his behavior either, base your choices on how to protect yourself on the worst case scenario and again, if it goes well bonus round. Be fair, nonpunitive and firm as hell. You obviously have some financial acumen and a little knowledge about your state's laws, sometimes that's as dangerous as taking advice from someone like me is. NO ONE knows your case like you do, you should take what you know and then find out how the law applies to you. Seriously, answer your own questions with advice from counsel. Even then don't take his/her word for it as gospel, read the law and ask. I disagree with counsel sometimes in my job, I might understand the argument he's trying to make under a statute but right where that position be attacked. Depending upon the situation I might direct him not to take some positions. I try to leave no room for a counter a lot of attorneys actually want the battle so watch out for it. Protect yourself, think about what you want to accomplish and good luck. webcam xxx
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