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The cure is the internal realization that dad is flawed, the family was hurt by her mother's death, and adults CAN get the and support they need elsewhere. What's hurting her is the belief that dad has some magic elixir that he could provide if he wanted to. He doesn't have it. And his perceived lack of isn't a choice: it's a flaw, a deficiency, baggage, a wound inside him. Whether she interacts with him or not, SHE has to stop longing for something that isn't there. SHE has to let go of the idea that ONLY dad has the magical goodies. Not seeing him won't stop the longing or the fantasy that dad is the only one who can heal her pain. What stop it is accepting reality: Dad's a mere mortal, who's flawed and confused and handled a difficult situation poorly; and adults CAN cultivate loving and supportive relationships that are every bit as healing and typiy MORE healing than a close relationship with a parent. At some point, we all have to give up the fantasy that life would be a bowl of cherries if mom and dad had been perfect. swm looking to spoil youI definitely prefer positive loving people and environments, and would rather make someones day than totally shit in their face but I've learned in this life a few things * Nothing is ever perfect in life, not even my mother * Your are your life. * Marriage is a commitment to each other and is sacred, even if it is not "traditional". * Some rules can be broken and forgiven, some cannot * If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all * Always choose your battles wisely you cannot win them all. * All people have addictions, some are just more hurtful than others, good and bad I didn't have much of a choice to ever live a "normal" life, the first time my step brother "showed me some stuff" was when I was only 6 years old but I have learned that everyone, including ones we and ones we don't even know can be so very hurtful its so much easier to tear someone down than lift them up was how they were taught. I know my soul is a loving caring committed fighting soul and thats what matters most, I'm going to find happiness someday. I would also never say a negative thing to someone who didn't deserve it so if you think you are entitled to give some shit then you better be prepared to back it up I've gotten a lot of training and experience from putting up with others Just be prepared when you have to answer to the one that matters most it doesn't matter what I think Thanks again blind date sex
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