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Huntington swinger wife infact quite the opposite.. they have lots of control, strenght and power. any GOOD Dom knows his respects this, and as as I said before looks at the big picture and puts the needs and saftey of their partners 9sub or not) at the fore front. Sound like an oxy moron right? well you cant beat someone with a paddle, or demand them to do something with yout knowing limitations, where true harm lies. you have to think for every step of the way, and give after care. Being with a sub is not about them being ordered around and surendering control and power, as much as i is about them being WILLING to be ordered around by you. You stated your partner said in a fight you are just rom mates. well people say things in anger. and it sounds like you guys fight often. She told you she didnt want you kissin her butt, yet you did, and she told you off again. Not a god Dom action. again you are asking the woman you met to conform to an ideal she is not willing to. This is not a new situation.. You knew her before she got knocked up I think its selfish of you to expect her change herself just cuz you want her to. You show the short mindedness, the lack of thought, and lack of true concern for a partner let alone a sub to have any sub feel safe with you. I can honestly hear the echos of any subs in this forum running for the hills. I mean if you cant make up your mind on this, how can they trust you with their safety, their body, heart, soul, life??!! You dont need another partner.. you need to step back and fix yourself and figure out whats truly important before bringing yet another life in to the mess. and it dont matter if its the mental illusion of cheating or doing its actually doing the deed.. your heart and mind is not in the right spot to pull it off without it leading to drama in the future. seriously get help.. sex partners Moriarty
whether I should respond to this post. I suppose I'm embarrassed myself because I've been in the same situation for a little over six years and it does fuck with your self esteem. It becomes difficult to experience yourself as an attractive sexual being and your sexuality is such a wonderful part of yourself it extends beyond the act and flavors the way you interact in other circumstances. Just as not having it changes the nature of your relationship. The creative beautiful force that is sexuality has an important and valid place in your life. It is Okay to want it and it. I have gone around in circles just as you have and asked myself all the questions other people are posing. Obviously I've chosen to stay, she is my wife, life has been hard for us and I believe that there is something more that we can become together. Although I am a lot older than you I also feel as if I am “stopping my sex life before it started”. My partner and I are priests in our ancestral tradition, we are parents together… these things along with my dwindling belief in my sexual value, intensify the pressure to work it out. I’m sure If I was your age I would have left. I have no wisdom for you, I’m still working it out. I can’t say yet whether the pressure to stay has been a blessing or not. It is still a work in progress. I say, consider that the problem could be physical, she should talk to a doctor about it, there are physical changes or imbalances that can effect a person this way. Consider whether it is psychological/emotional counseling together and apart could be helpful. Do understand that this is a problem that either she is going to have to also identify as a problem and choose to work on with you. Or that you have to resolve without her which in my mind means leaving. Also understand that even if it is a physical problem, sex is never just sex. My partner and I have tried creating days /times/dates to be romantic but we found the intimacy /trust/self esteem has been lost in the process and needs to be rebuilt. Also understand that her self esteem be just as effected as yours. She also be embarrassed and or not have any understanding of what is going on with her. Good luck and remember that there is nothing wrong with you. suck you dry suck you dry
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