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and I do not want to divert the thread here. I have known and accepted my bisexuality since I was 15 (I'm now 69) and been in a lot of discussion groups, real as well as virtual, with other bisexuals. I know that there successful relationships in which one spouse is bi. Your husband be bi, he be a repressed, he definitely is repressing his feelings. Can you help him? You certainly are doing your fair share. He needs to help himself. He needs to open up and be able to do that with some other men in discussion rather than with you at first. That was the purpose of my suggestion. As fedguy says, divorce, or threatening it be a way of putting pressure on him to make him start responding. Definitely pull back, stop being sexual, don't be as supportive. But don't unnecessarily be vindictive. Make him work for your. Save your energy for yourself. Definitely do start looking out for yourself. Let him that you can move forward without him. He decide he has to catch up. You can e-mail me (or better yet, he can) through if that would help, I might go into more detail, I certainly would emphasize to him the value of opening up to you. sex ladies in XiaqingI heard a lot of that nonsense from my partner as well. It was a defense mechanism due to her own shame and embarrassment. Please don't buy into it. You can't begin to deal with it until every one is being honest without attacking. and I felt for myself and for you that it is just not fair to treat someone as a friend but expect them to stay committed as a lover. It does not allow you to be a whole person in the relationship and it does not allow you to move on and find fulfillment where, and I don't just mean sexually, anytime you cut off a part of yourself your not whole. I also agree that some sort of trauma is likely but until everyone is communicating honestly compassionately and responsibly no change is possible and no change is not an option. horny chat
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