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i want to eat hairy cunt - that you two be together. You can't do that to yourself. I want you to think about specific objectives you meet every day. You write down a reason why you are better off without him. He showed you how uncaring he can be towards you so just imagine if you had married him and were getting divorced now; he might be even more hurtful towards you since you were involved with him longer. Find ways to reinforce the idea that you dodged a bullet. You don't want someone with a mean streak and an uncaring heart. If you can't think of a new reason why you are better off without him then think of supporting arguments for those reasons you have already. He would be a bad father because of his mean streak. He might make enemies out of people you socialize with because of his mean steak. You also need to have a regular objective of getting a network of friends so you can be more independent in your next relationship and not feeling so lonely when you have your differences. Every relationship goes through difficulties so you need to have a support system to on during those times. So every day do something to get yourself out there making new friends, new connections. Check out , pursue activities in your area like book clubs, scrabble matches at a local bookstore, activities at your local library, joining a support group, get friendly with your neighbors, volunteering, join a church or a, etc. And if you need a distraction then focus on your career. Find ways to further your education if it is watching university lectures on. But don't, under any circumstance, go looking for info about him and how he has moved on. That just make you hurt even more. You should not hate him but you should him for what he is and your still wanting to be with him means you are not seeing him in a realistic light. You need to work on that to get over him.
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