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lizza in fife amateurs swinger I feel like a mindfuck is so totally dependent upon trust, that the motivations of the person in the control position are of utmost importance, as is a clear enough understanding of what the consent allow. If the goals are to push boundaries and create recoverable discomfort, and that is what is accomplished, great. If under the same goals, what is accomplished is the creation of abject fear and a threat response, then I believe the consent boundary has been pushed. So then, it is either a matter of safeword or willingness to process afterward in a manner both agree to follow. Messing with someone's head is often used out of the realm of consent, ie. interrogation, but there is no out. If there are concerns of going too far, whether physiy or emotionally, then prearrange an out. Aaahh This so got me thinking of some wonderful levels of being uncomfortable. Wondering who can you or what is going on when you aren't fully clothed and your eyes are closed is one of my faves!
horny and ready to get the day started Dear compassionate one, Please never disregard your gut feelings about a person and/or situation. Disregarding our intuition usually lands us in a mess or in danger. You are obviously very wise and mature to pick up on these red flags. They are definitely not in your imagination. Your "friend" is obviously operating from a state of fear. Fear promotes irrational and neurotic thoughts and behaviors. He be suffering from some degree of post-traumatic stress syndrome, but would have to a professional for a diagnosis. It is not wrong, weak, or unhealthy for you to feel compassion for him for his losses and his current state of pain. However, as any professional counselor tell you, all your and compassion won't fix him. It is natural to be attracted to his positive attributes. But from the obsessive/compulsive behaviors he's demonstrated in such a very short period of time, his unhealthy side would dominate the relationship. His need to make it official so is an indication that he is not operating from a place a strength. He is making the very common mistake that of us often do by jumping back into a relationship to heal the wounds and fill the emptiness of the one(s) that previously ended. I one thing that you learned from this is that if something does not "feel" right, there is usually a valid reason. I have one important word for you boundaries! You compromised your boundaries in the beginning by giving in to his pressure for a commitment too. You recovered by re-establishing your boundaries by declaring that you not open your life to a person who does not respect your time, personal space, etc But do you how you felt bad for establishing that boundary with him.? There is a great book titled "Boundaries" by Cloud and Townsend that you find very insightful. I think anyone would benefit from reading that book. Boundaries can be tricky, but stick to your instincts. It's understandable that you his good side, but please don't trick yourself into thinking that you can somehow have the side without the weight and toll of the unhealthy. Perhaps you could find peace in praying for him.? Be intentional and determined to meet a guy who has his wonderful qualities. Please don't settle! Best wishes to you!
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