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"However, one person has informed me that the therapist's job is to let the patient become in whatever way the patient thinks is. So, on the one hand, it would seem that there is no external or universal standard of, that it is % relative. But at the same time another person has said that there are known best practices, another one said that there are people they personally would not because they could not give them neutral advice, another said that it was wise to have lots of options since people are different and "fit" matters in the relationship." So the patient comes to a therapist and says, "I am always spending all my money when I don't need to and I'm in debt and I don't know how to change this, but I want to." Now we have the goal of the patient. The patient's idea of "-" in this situation sounds like she wants to function inside her budget but doesn't. So she and her therapist explore that her behaviors behind it, her feelings behind the behaviors, etc. She come to the realization that she shops for things to make herself feel special so they try to come up with other ways to fill that space without spending her money. (Notice in no part of the is the therapist's feelings, judgments or even thoughts on the issue have any relevance to this process.) I'd the the run of the mill talk therapy. the terms "therapist" and "counselor" are often interchanged often incorrectly. Most often a "counselor" is not a licensed therapist, but a "therapist" or "clinician" is. It is the latter that most likely be following the best practices for a mental health therapist. Regarding "fit": therapy *is* a messy science because personalities are involved. So I not feel comfortable with a therapist who has a certain style or personality. Even though they act within the same set of guidelines personality leaks through. And styles. Within the practice I worked for one therapist's office had incense burning and big cushy chairs and cushions on the floor and another had a desk with two hard chairs facing directly at one another. Or within talk therapies psychoanalysis might annoy some (exploring one's childhood/formative years) or cognitive behavioral therapy might feel impersonal. girl wants sex in Sweets Crossinghe expects? Are you a maid or a wife? don't you have a right to expect things too? Like to expect your husband to say nice things to you or be affectionate with you? I believe in marriage too but if you're the maid and he's a jerk, then what you've got IS NOT a marriage. Why are you staying? Do you feel guilty because he's in poor health? Have the problems in the marriage started since his health has been failing? Has he had any kind of counseling to help him deal with the health issues he's facing? Have you had any? Have you two ever been to marriage counseling? sex with granny
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