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that using humor all the time, to deflect and to lessen the seriousness of things is also a "negative" behavior. If one can't be serious when one needs to be, there can be repercussions to that as well. The only way I survived middle/high school was by keeping myself very withdrawn, and by trying to make the bullies laugh. If they were laughing hard enough I'd have enough time to get away. Also as a kid, living with someone with depression and having no idea how to "make it better", my bro and I would try to keep everyone's spirits up, and I still use humor as a coping mechanism occasionally. Cuz, if I'm laughin, I'm not dead. sedated in South San Francisco pa
But it's true that don't reap the awesome reward of my insight and genius,humor and kindness because they are blinded by irrational hate mongering. It's a gang of people who agre with eah other. +stirs up a batch of Kool-aid+ Here, have some. Fort Walton Beach slut sexand you didn't twirl his fancy. So, rather than waste his and your time, he laid it on the line. Mercenary? Yes. Cold? Yes. Rude? Yes, in a way. But at least you both got establishing his level of attraction for you and the quality of his character out of the way much right off the bat. It's not the way I'd prefer to operate nor is it the way I'd prefer my associates to operate, but it's how a lot of guys DO operate. You can accept that with some sense of humor, a sigh and an "oh well" or you can get all riled up, offended and generalize his behavior to apply to all men as you have done. Not a good idea, IMO. Through cultivating a jaded, simplistic image of all your brothers, you are likely to stereotype perfectly wonderful, loving, classy men as "yet another rude shallow fag" and dismiss them out of hand. Much better, I think, to give everybody a fair to prove themselves and to judge each individual based on his own merit than to assume he's just like the last 5 men that you've met. Too often, I've encountered men who proudly proclaim "I'm not like those other gays" and then whine about being single. It's a form of arrogance, it keeps them isolated. They "hate" men, it keeps them single and they wonder why. Uhm duh Come down from your lofty mountain and join the fray. Have some light-heartedness and some compassion for those of your brothers who are confused or hating themselves. When you encounter those who are well-adjusted and willing to connect meaningfully (whether platoniy, sexually or romantiy), hold on to and those connects. don't be so mission-oriented for finding romance and let it come to you. Realize that you ARE just like "those other guys" because we're not just one hive mind, there's all kinds including those who are just like yourself. dating a married woman
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