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First, good for you for diving into how you feel about this and not just immediately dismissing your boyfriend because he told you he is bisexual. That’s a great start to responding to some big and surprising news. I’m responding as a woman who is bisexual myself. Years into my term relationship with my straight male partner, I shared that I had realized I was bisexual and we continued in our relationship beyond that. I’m not sure if you identify as straight or as part of the LGBT community, but straight people sometimes do not understand the difficulty for those of us who are in the process of coming out. It can be really scary to say that aloud to the people we after a lifetime of societal pressure to be heterosexual. I’m willing to bet that it was scary for your boyfriend to come out to you and risk your leaving him after you told him. It speaks volumes about the degree to which he trusts you, and how much he values your relationship, that he has done this. There are unfortunately a lot of hurtful myths about bisexuality, as evidenced by some bigoted responses you received to your post—we can’t commit to monogamous relationships, we cheat because need to simultaneously must have both genders as lovers, we want to have threesomes, we are confused and can’t make up our minds if we’re or straight, ad nauseum. And then there is the opinion, as evidenced here, that we who are bisexual don’t even exist. After knowing this is my gender identify for 20 years, it still stings when people negate a whole group of people so sweepingly. What being bisexual means is being attracted to both genders. That’s it. Sure, some bisexuals cheat and sleep around. So do lots of straight people. In other words, we’re just like the rest of the spectrum of humanity. So talk to your boyfriend. Ask him how he thinks being bisexual affects his life. If you’re afraid it damage your relationship, share those fears with him. Assuming you decide to continue in your relationship, ask him how you can support him as you remind yourself that he is bucking societal pressures. You find that talking openly about this bring you closer as a couple. Finally, it can super helpful to do some reading and defuse those fears with real information. Check this out. Common Myths About Bisexuality: Owensboro mature wants sexNovember 25, By THE basement auditorium of the Jewish Community Center on the Upper West Side is a sincere space. Big, brown and bare, it suggests a school gym, a place for officially sanctioned fun — which made a recent concert by Schmekel, a raucous klezmer-core punk band made up of “ % trans Jews,” all the more surprising. “Schmekel” means little penis in Yiddish, and is a play on the fact that all members were born female but now identify themselves on the masculine side of the gender spectrum. It’s an appropriate name for a band that started as a laugh. “I made a joke at a diner about how it’d be funny if there were an all-transmasculine band ed Schmekel that was all Jews,” said Lucian Kahn, 29, a guitarist and vocalist. On the spot, Nogga Schwartz, a bassist, and Riot, keyboardist and vocalist, both 26, joined up. Within a few weeks they had found a drummer, Simcha Halpert-Hanson, also 26. The wry and slightly naughty name is part of the band’s hallmark style, which is without being innocent, and funny without being ironic. Their influences include Zappa and, and their lyrics — about subjects ranging from Dumpster-diving to Jewish religious ceremonies — are personal, political and pointed. The music itself merges traditional klezmer scales and rhythms with the energy of early punk bands like Division. If the musical satirist Lehrer were to write a hard-core anthem about sex reassignment surgery, with a driving guitar lick, a “Hava Nagila” breakdown and a keyboard line lifted from Super Brothers, it might approximate the Schmekel sound. In the year and a half they have been together, the band members have performed for audiences around New York City:, straight, Jewish and gentile. They recently finished recording an independent album, “Queers on Rye,” and they embarked this month on a small tour of colleges in the Northeast. They have garnered attention from general-interest publications like New York magazine, as well as identity-based outlets like Homoground, The Jewish Daily Forward and Jewcy. divorced wants
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