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For one thing, I have to be upfront and tell you that I do not believe in "self-esteem". Or, rather, I think the term has been misused to the point where it's hard to recognize. I think gelg is correct, in that self-esteem is more a matter of in one's own competency and assurance that one is capable of solving the problems that life throws at you. How does one develop that sense of competency and assurance? By doing it over and over and over again. By failing, sometimes, and realizing that you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get moving again after a disappointment either being fired, losing a relationship, not achieving a goal, etc. EVERYONE fails at some point in life, and it's what we learn from those failures that help us succeed in future endeavors. And here's the problem: There's a whole generation of whose parents brought them up afraid to allow them to fail, because they were afraid that it would "damage their self esteem." What we're now seeing is the result of that well-meaning but misguided notion people grew up under a false series of life "successes" where they were constantly told how wonderful they were. You know the philosophy: No one is allowed to lose, that's why everyone gets a trophy. Their ability to figure out ways around obstacles was never challenged, and when they finally DO face some kind of failure, they fall apart. Then there's the aspect of being inner-driven, rather than outwardly-driven. Outwardly-driven people spend a great deal of time worrying about what other people think about them, and trying to gain the approval of others even if that so-ed "approval" is fleeting or superficial, and sometimes, not even good for the person (.,). How can anyone have 'self' confidence when everything they do, think or feel is dictated by others? There is no sense of "self" they simply become mirrors. There's more but that's the basics. hot party friday
I am honored, pleased that she has chosen the house (both beauty and costs)but it is some work. I opened my mouth and now take care of food bar servers,prep, tents,tables etc, whatever it takes! Only abut 60 guests which I am sure grow by next year. Not to be too much of a smart ass, but the other side, is not too great at getting things together in a simple tasteful manner. I have pulled off far larger and complicated than this. (the garden trellis/arbor she wanted was $ , and I do not need one in my gardens, but I found a veryclose one and bought it for #38, and she loves it! $ in spray paint and it is done, and saved the $ for whatever. I already ordered fall and perennials and figured out what annuals can be in bloom, about another $ for the gardens can we spark lets chatby an old bat that still believed in and practiced psychoanalysis according to Freud. I shit you not, she said that when her daughter hopped up onto a bench and jumped off repeatedly during a moment of playing, her daughter was secretly hoping she (the mother) would jump onto the bench and fall off and die so she (the daughter) could abscond with her own father. And that this was all quite. I think it's twisted to think such things based off a game of "jump on the bench and jump off." I think people like THAT being responsible for the psychological well-being of others is fucking appalling, honestly. :/ dating sites canada
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