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What if a couple followed your plan exactly? He works, she's a SAHM, they have a traditional, 50's marriage. They struggle to make it on one salary, but they live in a fixer-upper home that sucks up a lot of upkeep money. Second hand car, shared between them, making do. She works in the garden, cans and freezes fresh produce, shops the bargains, does all the thrifty tricks to make ends meet. Fruit trees, grape vines, fruit bearing bushes. They're broke, but happy. Then one day her DH drops dead of a heart attack. She has to take out a (or uses his meager insurance policy) for his burial expenses, and now she's flat broke. She can sell the house, try to find work (good luck, with younger women with degrees competing for minimum wage jobs). But she has no cash left, and hungry mouths to feed. Would you snip at her for having she couldn't afford? Circumstances change. People have to adapt. In her case, she either takes some public assistance and trains for a full-time career, or they're homeless and starving. Sad thing is, most folks would piss and moan anyway because this irresponsible, middle aged woman, is sucking the life out of welfare while they bust their asses at work. I say, enjoy that righteous indignation while you can. Before, your own job might be outsourced and you could find yourself in the same boat. Uh-oh, that boat's leaking, so you'd better bail fast, or learn how to tread water. looking for a best friend and eventually moreI actually haven’t voiced my disappointment for lack of support with friends or family because I’m a private person and it’s not something I want to make an issue…I guess this was my outlet for the frustration. I’m definitely not going to wallow on this. For my 28 years, I’ve had a lifetime of unfortunately traumatic (and good of course) experiences. This exit on the highway of life not be smooth sailing but I won’t let it get me down. I don’t wallow in personal tragedies, situations, or transitions, but look for what I can gain in life from that experience. I only really embraced that philosophy last year. When I first got out of my abusive marriage I definitely “wallowed” for a month and a half only to learn that it was time wasted and I was pushing people farther instead of closer, and thus, making myself miserable. You do have to question people’s perception and responses though when they bitch about something online. I wanted feedback to how others have handled it, and to say what people don’t really like hearing…which is that it does happen dating and
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