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closely related that this puts an entire new on any advise I might give you. I have been a stepparent, I believe I'm a good one. I also believe that I took my stepson's welfare into account in every decision I made. Truth be told, I a very large potential here for your to suffer severe conflicts. Especially when you consider their dad a shitty father. Remember, this is NOT a previous relationship, nope, your relationship with the other parent is a current one. One that be there until the day you die to some extent. The connection is unavoidable. One of the largest hurdles for us to get over was the relationship or should I say lack there of..with my stepson's dad. I know my efforts to be a good parent to C was seen and recognized. A key in that was to make if VERY clear I was not there to be his dad. A parent yes, his father NO. The job has been taken. In clearing the hurdles of blended families you also have to show a it's ok to the other parent. You have to bury that resentment you, do NOT look to eachother in supporting it. Do not validate eachother's poor opinion of him and don't seek it. Dealing with the stress and emotions? You bet, most people can relate to the conflicts that can arise but unless there is real danger, not shit you just disagree with but real danger, your job is to also make damn sure your know you aren't going to put them in the middle of the crap between you. That means support when the wants to the father and at times, a firm discussion that they should even when they don't want to. No, no one has been in your shoes and no one would react exactly the way you did. But you are making some statements that reveal your to be a 'mother' to his and wanting someone to show your how a father should act. That's potentially a very damaging mindset. Regardless of 'when' people meet your, your goals should really be reevaluated. find local sluts free in NanguikahaI have a funny hate relationship with pain, and have always had "life is pain" and "you have to be hard to survive" pounded into my head, and I think in a broader sense, that plays into my feelings of priding myself on being tough and demanding the same from my partner. I have found that, in the past, when I was in relationships with submissive people who struck me as soft or weak-willed the game just grew boring very quickly. I wanted someone who could take some damage without expressing it too much. Looking back, we were probably just on different wavelengths and had different needs and such, but at the time I viewed these people as unworthy. Now, having read what CeCe said in the thread above about people with superiority complexes covering for their own inferiority has REALLY got me thinking! Hahah. There was a time, too, when I was obsessed with extremity for its own sake, and I needed someone who was willing to go to extremes with me. And anyone who wasn't down for it was a big old pussy. I had to do some seedy things in order to get those so-ed needs fulfilled. That was a dark time. Turns out those people who refused me weren't total pussies, they were just sane! LOL And not willing to do whatever it took to get a piece of tail. ;) Nowadays, although I still that "oh, I how tough you are, toughness is very attractive" thing with me, I am glad to have sacrificed my superiority complex (ahem, somewhat anyway) and to have sacrificed the extremity (I probably always crave it, though) in order to find this deeper, more true connection with someone I can trust %. The family bond ties tightly, and I know our views of each other have changed for the better since becoming a family changed our lives. Ha, you want to talk about rambling wow! Just look at this post. extreme dating
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