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First of all, what you are looking for is a marital and relationship counselor, not a personal counselor. Second, if your spouse refuses to go, go yourself. You can learn a huge amount about how to deal with things simply by seeing a counselor and getting suggestions on how to deal with different scenarios and situations. Eventually you make be able to talk him into going once he sees you are getting help, he decide that he doesn't want to get left out. You can a phychiatrist, a psychologist, or a licensed couselor. All of these offer "couseling", but the first two are actually degreed professionals. A "counselor", on the other hand, can be anyone who cares to out a shingle. I would personally recommend someone who actually has a degree in the field. There's also a difference between "counseling" and "therapy". Which of these you (two) most need can best be determined by consulting with a degreed professional. Finding a counselor can be as easy as typing in "Marraige counseling seattle" into or e, and then following some of the links. Find about 8 or 10 and them to if (a) they handle your sort of problem (b) they are taking new clients and (c) you think you could get along with them. Then winnow down the results and make a selection. don't hesitate to change people if things don't progress; sometimes you have to try two or before you find someone who is both effective and whose personal style fits yours. By the way, I'm in the Seattle area, and have some recommendations if you would like, of a couple of people that I have personal experience with. me if you'd like me to tell you. nsa for birthday
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