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geek dating Roark Kentucky When a codependent does reach out for help, they're smacked around and criticized, ed an attention whore and all sorts of other names. Part of this is to help set the person straight, for sure. Part of it is the forum saying, here you codependent, this is what a boundary looks like. But I think part of it is also because when the codependent self-identifies, they tag themselves as being receptive to. Then they get more of it. Even when they're seeking help. It's a very subtle thing but it happens every time. I just found this link on codependency. Does it ring true to you? I kept looking for paragraphs to copy and paste into this post, but much every single one resonates. free chat to Glendale girls looking for sex
28625 sex chats IF you decide to break up with this guy and it's a really good idea that you do you need to mean it. What that means is you don't him, talk to him, answer his. s or texts none of it. When you say good-bye, and it's a really good idea that you do you can't waver. Make sense? Saying "We're done." has to be said with stamina and you don't go into it or explain yourself or try to defend your position. You make a statement and shut the door. He'll know why he betrayed you, By making a direct and simple statement and sticking to it you create your boundary. If you answer his s, you'll be allowing him to cross your boundary. If you engage him in arguements, or listen to him plead for forgiveness or whatever, you'll be allowing him to cross your boundary. Create a space around you that he simply can't enter. best lisbon love hot sex
Actually, that's BS. You need to have your own boundaries and it's not up to him to tell you what they should be. That's a difficult and painful truth, especially for the person on the other side of the boundary. Believe me, this come up. And not just about sex. don't do anything you don't want to do just for him. You not feel (when you're 30) like he *thinks* you at all. You're not him. He can't read your mind, nor can he predict the future. But if this turns you on if you like the idea of fucking someone while he watches then by all means go for it. He's offering this to you as a gift; you can accept or reject it, it's up to you. It's all about you here. Yeah it be a turn on for him if you WANT to do it. If he is indeed committed to you like you think he is it would be a huge turn OFF for him if you did NOT want to do it but do it just for him (even if you get off), unless you're a very good liar, but you'll regret it later and it even cause more problems. If it were me and my wife offered this to me, I'd do it before she changed her mind but I'm wired that way ;) local sluts Kingston mn
Set a bounary, and defend it. Also, remember that the boundary is none of his business, and he can not be relied up or enlisted to help you enforce it. Just set it, defend it, and walk away. It is a gut wrenching pain, and I understand it. But better to go through it once and be done with it than to re-engage and start the whole pain cycle over at the beginning each time you have contact. xxx from TalkeetnaSorry you had to go through this. I know the feeling I still get it sometimes if I'm at a party and DG is interacting with someone other than me or GA. Thankfully this doesn't happen very often I wish the feeling would go away, quite honestly, but it doesn't so I've had to try to learn to cope with it. Sometimes more successfully than others. I think your friend and the guy you are/were interested just didn't understand the strength of your feeling for the guy. It seems to me maybe you didn't understand it yourself, or you would have been able to convey to your friend in no uncertain terms that he was off limits. Perhaps other things about your situation made them think it wasn't crossing a boundary: I assume they both know you have a deep, ongoing relationship with someone? Perhaps they assumed your openness to a Poly lifestyle would permit them to play without you having a negative reaction to it? You are a smart, intuitive, incredibly articulate woman could it be that they assumed if you hadn't told either of them they were off-limits to each other, that they were fair game? It seems to me that if your friend is, as you say, one of your best friends, she wouldn't horn in on your "territory" if she thought it was "your" territory. She seems to have a genuine interest in the guy, from what you've said she has subsequently communicated to you do you think she is the type of person that would let herself go there if she truly thought she were stepping on your toes? FYI, I am by no means sure I'm reading this accurately just throwing out another theory among the others that have been offered previously. horney girl
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