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Hey guys, I have been a homo for 15 years now and have only dated one guy (about 13 years ago for months). I have had my share of one night stands and gym steam room sex, but have always wanted more, so I don't engage very often in casual sex. Although I am probably above average in looks, I don't really get much male attention and when I do try to flirt or talk to other guys, I get the total brush off. This has compounded over the years, eating away at self-esteem and confidence. I tried to meet somebody the other day for a first date via and was terrified of rejection and failure so I canceled. This experience has made me realize how little self esteem I have when it comes dating and I don't know what to do about it. The thing I have been telling myself is that, it seems like such a superficial thing to be worried about, being "undatable and undesirable". I have my basic human needs met (employed, with a roof over my head, food to eat, etc) and I have it a lot easier than the majority of the population on this earth, all of which I am grateful for So, I am trying to just come to terms with this. It isn't the worst thing in the world to be "undatable" and perpetually single how to I come to accept this, but not in a feel sorry for myself kind of way. Should I just find a good therapist??!?! Thanks very attractive fit wanting more* Sounds like a form of acceptance of 'this is not the life i envisioned for myself,' from him. He feels stuck, overwhelmed and helpless, sad that things not change. He has no more goals to believe in himself with, so he has a roof, food, and hours a day with sleep -TV, to just drop out of life and not try anymore Depression. He has also probably let his body go and just shoveling crap empty food s inside now Once, you were everything to him, a partner, a lover, a team mate to work hard and make feel loved, safe and important and that you mattered to him He has chosen not to and live that life of actions and words with you now a choice. * You can accept. ** He need professional help, words or medication to improve himself. ' through sickness and health.' ** You can pretend your married and go be superwoman and have your own outside full life of activities and friends. *** You can take one person therapy council and how thoughts and work assignments might be able to help a bit, until he wants to wake up, shake the rust off and live again Sounds like you need a clean and clear letter written and set aside for him, while you go take a weekend away and tell him if certain actions are not taken in a certain amount of time, then alone and all the financial crap of going your own ways is what next springtime has in store for you married and lonely
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