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Sure, he probably fantasized about her when he was her friend before we started dating, but I highly doubt he fantasized about her after we got serious, especially since he was fed up with her shitty behavior. Even if he did think she was hot, so what? As as he's not trying to measure us against each other, masturbating to the thought of her or engaging in any inappropriate behavior I would discourage him from doing with any other girl, I don't care. I think his brother is hot, but he has a repulsive personality, doesn't mean I'm engaging in anything inappropriate. As for the nine years of dating. We're late high-school sweethearts. years into dating, my brother died, putting plans for moving in together on hold. Eventually we moved in together, then my mother was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic, terminal breast cancer. I moved back into her place to be a full time caregiver. That put our plans for marriage on hold. Right now we're trying to get through the next year while retaining our sanity. We don't need the chaos of a wedding on top of the day to day chaos of a cancer diagnosis. You're very judgmental, you know that? For me, exclusive dating for 9 years has worked. We're happy, we're monogamous and we communicate. We know that eventually we want to get married, but we both want to be in more emotionally and financially secure places. long term romantic relationship wanted
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