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the earliest memory i have of my father was laying in bed with him, both of shirts off. I'm not sure if there was a sexual componet to this or not. i think i remeber my mother coming in and getting mad at him ( they split before i was born) and i never really saw him that much. the second earliest memory i was 6 and my sister 11, she asked me to look inthe bathroom and tell her how big his penis was while he was peeing. that last one gives me chills, but my sister and I get along OK today, but I've never brought it up to her because im afraid to her reaction to it, she might deny it, or tell our mother or what ever idk. thats not the issue. but when i was 11, my mother married and the who i now refer to as my stepdad. He used and her, he cleaned up real quick ( my momma don't take shit from no one!!!) but this did alter my view of him and made me more distrustful of men. now im 23 and i have a two good guy friends and have been in (semi) relationship. the thing is I've also been bi-sexual, I don't think i could do a relationship with a unless he was straight acting and really really laid back. basiy i want a "bro" who i could have sex with. and i hate guys and their fucking drama!!!! there just so fucking picky! i can't stand it. its like every guy I've met has had to find SOMETHING to complain about it drives me NUTS. my therapist said this could be a repulsion to men out repulsion to my won feelings, but i don't think so, i think it's that i hate picky people in general. now i feel like if i found a good mentally woman who loved me and wasn't a pshycho ( my first and only ex GF would try to make everything my fault and make me feel guilty even though she admitted to being in the wrong) it could work out.( keep in mind that the reason i only had one GF is because I've been focused on school and work) but i do still fantasize about guys, and their dicks, i wonder sometimes when i a really attractive guy walking down the street ( jackman type) how big their is. is this an effect of what happened to me as a? did it make me bi-sexual? I think if i really found true with a woman that this wouldn't be an issue. do you agree? single girl Manning Parknothing constructive or objective to say. As I said in the first place I am looking for constructive thoughts or advice from who are now adult that did live through a vicious divorce. I am trying to make sense of what is happening since I have no experience with being a of divorce. So once again if you don't have anything constructive or helpful to add then just don't respond. don't try to tell people what emotion they should or should not have over the loss of a. I think every emotion is understandable and acceptable. The adult thing to do is to seek counsel from peers and to make sense of the emotion before taking action. This is what I am attempting to do both from friends and family as well as those who maybe do not have any affiliation with either family. My thought is really even seeking some advice and thoughts from those who have been a of divorce. So if none of that makes sense to you then just leave me alone. Your negative advice and thoughts are unhelpful and unwanted. I have received some very helpful and constructive thoughts from a few on this site. Defiantly things to think about before taking any action. So if you are one of those who gave some constructive advice Thank you. However if you are one of those who has only told me I have no right to be angry, hurt, sad, or that I am not her mother .Then step off .I am just as much her mother as I am the mother to the I have adopted. Therefore I be hurt when she lashes out, I be forgiving when she reaches out, and I be protective when I think she is being hurt, and I her as deeply as I do any of the that have wandered into my home and my life, AND NOT YOU OR ANYONE TELL ME I HAVE NO RIGHT that she has a mother . I know who have a birth mother but the title of mother is not given to those who just squeeze a out. Any dumb ass can squeeze a out. Mother is an endearing term that is reserved for those who, nurture and protect the helpless. hot asian women
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