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I know, after reading my own post it does sound silly in a way since we are still communicating and have agreed not to other people. It's just been a dramatic change going from spending the night together every night and talking multiple times a day to now talking only once or twice a day. I have apologized profusely for my mistakes but he's concerned that this not be the last time. I can fully understand where his concerns come from but there are certain things we have endured together in our relationship where I think my anger stem from. And I want him to help me grow through these things, not turn his back on me. I just was hoping someone have had a similar experience and could shed some light :) Thanks. want 40 year old woman
was programmed at birth to be a Democrat, a big city liberal. My parents were and Catholic. Pardon any redundancy. In my slice of the East Bronx, you went to high school, you did a few years in the military, and then you came home to look for a job with Con Ed or the city. Two of my uncles were on the job, NY City cops. The guy across the street was a fireman. The neighborhood was mainly blue collar, Italian, Jewish, and just a Puerto Rican. The local political machine was run out of the Nest Society, a store front political club; or run out of the Step Inn, a bar on White Plains Road next to the fire station. The Step Inn was a microcosm of the neighborhood; the guy who owned building was Jewish, the guy who ran the saloon was, and the who made the pizza in the back was Italian. If you wanted a job with the borough or the city, or you needed something fixed on your street, you had to someone at the Nest clubhouse or at the Step Inn. There were no other political organizations in our precinct. Little did I know at the time, but my Bronx neighborhood was a mirror image of inner cities nationwide. I never heard anyone themselves a "conservative" and, just as surely, there were no Republican or Libertarian precinct captains in our area. I'm sure the good sisters of Our of Solace School must have mentioned that was the founder of the Republican Party, but for years I thought that that party had been killed by the Bull Moose Party at the turn of the 20th Century. Growing up, it would have never occurred to me, or anybody I knew, that political homogeneity was a bad thing. The Democratic Party was a rain maker, an employment office, and a pot hole fixer. There were no obvious reasons to question the civic monoculture or not to be a true believer. working girl wantedI need to clear a few things up. My husband had addiction problems several years back. I didn't know he was addicted to Loratabs. On his own, still without me knowing anything, he began treatment. The doctor prescribed him some opiiate replacements and anti-depressants. I could tell something was up because his personality changed. He went from and fun, friendly, loving guy with lots of energy to an emotional vegetable. We stop conversing, stop hanging out together, stopped having sex. He was extremely disconnected. I had just began back at college and thought that my schooling was the drain on our relationship. I thought he was no longer interested in me. I thought he was checking out of the relationship. I was discussing this with his step-mom and she mentioned that it could be a possibility since he really wasn't an education kind of guy because he dropped out in the 10th grade. She thought I knew this. I didn't. I was told by him that he graduated. When I confronted him he admitted lying and then admitted the usage. Things were still really bad. I would find out a new lie every week or so. He wouldn't let me be part of his treatment. We lived horribly for about nine months and then I decided I wanted a separation because things had really gotten bad. After being separated a while we decided to try to make it work and have been doing really well for the last year. That's the background of what he did. Here is what I did. I had a hard time forgiving him especially since the lies kept popping up and he was still horribly distant. I knew that I needed time and space to figure things out but didn't know how to tell him. I also really screwed up about a month before I asked for a separation. I cheated on him with a friend of ours who had knowledge about everything that was going on and was a supportive ear. I know that nothing my husband did or didn't do is any excuse for my actions. It's all back story and helps to explain my frame of mind at the time. I thought the end was inevitable. After we separated, I cooled off and could think clearly. I also saw and got to know the that I had married again. We decided to make it work. I decided to not tell him about the affair because I figured it would hurt everyone too much. I also made that decision upon the advice of our marriage counselor. married and flirting chat
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