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IRL I vacillate wildly between telling outrageous stories, having pretentious philosophical discussions, and being a complete hermetic shut-in. I've recently noticed it seems to have to do with the seasons. I'm wondering about SAD. Anyway, since the fo' has been slow as shit today, here's one of my stories: So, when I was in high school I lived for one year in this teeny, teeny ass town in Colorado where my mother was the City Clerk. Now, my mother takes infinite pleasure in teasing and annoying me (it's genetic, apparently), and one of her favorite things to do is pinch my ass. I have no idea why, except that it annoys the hell out of me. So, anyway, I go up to her office one day and there she is, standing over her desk, riffling through papers and looking for something while her friend S. was sitting behind the desk hunting around, too. The door was behind my mother, so when I went in, there was her huge (huge. huge! her ass is huge) ass right in my face, so of COURSE I had to run up and pinchpinchpinchpinch it like ten times. S.'s mouth dropped open, and my mother slowly, slowly stood up, turned around, and just stared at me like I was frigging crazy, at which point I managed to yelp out, "Aaaah!!!! You're not my mother!" Turns out it was, the Assistant Fire Chief for the county, and here I am, dumb fuck closeted 17 year old Ax pinching her ass. The entire next year, every time I saw her, she would giggle and wave like a little school girl just to fuck with me and my blush. Worst. Punishment. Ever. fuck buddies in Lawrencewake up, consider what a divorce, the payments, emotional shit, the move, two homes, rents, mortgages, cars, all the pissed off phone s, weekends with the, the cliche' would be like. Go figure out how to put % of the effort back to waking up' the marriage. It's a marathon asshole Anybody can fixate on an empty headed, almost no life experiences, empty boob and body who thinks its fun that an old -' has picked her up. Maybe the wife fantasizes a bit about that guy at work, the one who likes to dance, smells nice and has a 3 inches bigger and thicker then yours ( but she doesn't know that , yet ). Why not finally instead of guessing learn how to master pussy eating' ? So, the wife doesn't like to put foreign chemicals into her body, have side effects, feel lousy her fault, right ? Would you be proud to sit down today and tell your dad, grandfather what you are doing ? You're words, e-mails, pictures, texts are out there, forever now to harm you Embarrassment, blackmail Is this the promise you made on your wedding day ? People are laughing at you. Maybe work would fire you for your poor decision making local chat
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