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ca65 teens looking for sex in Lower Cabot Vermont VTThe cure is the internal realization that dad is flawed, the family was hurt by her mother's death, and adults CAN get the and support they need elsewhere. What's hurting her is the belief that dad has some magic elixir that he could provide if he wanted to. He doesn't have it. And his perceived lack of isn't a choice: it's a flaw, a deficiency, baggage, a wound inside him. Whether she interacts with him or not, SHE has to stop longing for something that isn't there. SHE has to let go of the idea that ONLY dad has the magical goodies. Not seeing him won't stop the longing or the fantasy that dad is the only one who can heal her pain. What stop it is accepting reality: Dad's a mere mortal, who's flawed and confused and handled a difficult situation poorly; and adults CAN cultivate loving and supportive relationships that are every bit as healing and typiy MORE healing than a close relationship with a parent. At some point, we all have to give up the fantasy that life would be a bowl of cherries if mom and dad had been perfect. best free dating
horny mifl Helena I appreciate your replies. They do ease my mind. I really do not want my marriage to end but I also want to feel safe and secure in it. That is where I am now these days. I have looked into getting more counseling for myself. I have encouraged him as well since he has a lot of issues from his childhood that he has dealt with by himself for years and years. As far as having time to ourselves, it is hard since we do not have anyone to watch our but we did finally go to the beach last and that was nice. We never had a honeymoon or vacation together. When we moved in together we also moved my sick Mother in with us so we just could not afford to go anywhere. We still wanted to each other so we just went to the courthouse. When I look back I guess we did have a lot going on but on. looking for my best friend that could turn into something more
Sunrise horny wives whoop the school lunch menu, which who controls that? feds? They are teaching them to eat this way. i have been in school meetings, and they say their hands are tied, becuae they don't have the funding to change it. They have to give the what the gov't doles out. There is a new wellness policy in the school, that demands for school parties, the class have only 2 snacks, and they must be whole grain, rice cakes, whole fruits/veggies, popcorn, etc no nuts for allergy cookies, no, no cupcakes, etc. BUT look at the March menu for lunches those same feds concerned about wellness dole out: I'd like to them offering soup/salad w/crackers it'd be so economical OR do like in Calli or the Maharishi school in Fairfield Iowa and grow everything in a greenhouse, organiy, and feed the students that all year round, or have them exused for lunch like they do there, and the parents can give them a not hurried time to digest the nutrition. don't kick the parents. It takes a village. and that's something coming from me, the cake, right? I feed my other things, ya know;and we do exersize shows on FIT TV, and we go cross country skiing, etc but there are OTHER influences i can't control. I can't force them to eat like me. I am so strange, ewwWwwwWW if all the parents were like you guys, believed in real food, then i would not have this fight on my hands to keep them well. There are other people involved here, the other parent and his mother who are over pounds, they visit them..have to clean the plate(I don't have that rule) and my hubby, the hard working snack monster, some of us are working hard as we can, but we don't have enough people on our side. it is a difficulty. freak n naughty female chat
a book ed: "ADD Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life" I began reading this book to mentally prepare for a visit to my dad's place, to make the first dent in tackling the parental hoarding situation. I also discussed the dynamics of hoarding with a psychologist and read about it on-line. I've seen a few programs on TV. An actual hoarder needs to be dealt with differently than a normal person. Guilt, shame, nagging, complaining does not work. They have layers of rationalizations that don't make sense to a normal person. For example, a stack of newspapers might be ed "a work station". Mom refused to discuss the hoarding mess, she would disolve into tears and then not talk to us for 9 months if it was brought up. I agree with the person who said the outside mess is a reflection of chaos on the inside. This is a complicated mental illness, some cross between OCD, ADD, depression and such. When dealing with a couple like my parents, it is further complicated by his resistance to change (he's used to living in the mess), criticizing, and the co-dependent lack of boundaries set in place over a 60 year marriage. My mother passed in so we are now facing the hurdle and burden of the clean up process, with, respect and, a ton of and a lot of psychological tactics to approach this one step at a time. However, you said that the GF is NOT a full blown hoarder. So, reading the book is a good place to start. There are genuine tips in it that can be helpful to tackling a big mess. Book also covers concepts like overwhelm, micro-focus, setting priorities, etc. I prefer the strategy of tackling stuff strategiy rather than one enormous clean out. It be interesting to if GF takes any steps toward bringing better organization to her life. And I'd wait to if she goes to counseling. Learning how to organize her life greatly benefit both her and her. The question is, do you have the, respect and to want to go through this process with her? I you at least try. After all, sometimes people come into our lives to be a catalyst for change. However, if you are a super neat freak, or tend to complain to get a person's agreement or compliance, then I'd explain to the GF that you are opposites in this regard, it is a deal breaker. gl older black City Arkansas looking for hung top
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