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Twenty years I have looked for love. I thought I had found it, twice, but I was wrong. It's hard not to lose hope. Now I'm not sure if we aren't all chasing fairy tales, an emotion invented by Hollywood, Hallmark and a coterie of delusional Romantic poets. Of course, I believe people can be in love, so long as they believe it, but our throwaway culture has us chasing after the next shiny thing, the instant gratification of fleeting passions. Maybe that's what it is. Maybe that's all it is. I am victim to it as well.
I guess I am either extraordinary or mediocre. Or extraordinarily mediocre. But doesn't extraordinary mean just more ordinary. In that case, "extraordinary" and "mediocre" would be synonyms.
In any case, I am trying to lead a meaningful life in accordance with some virtues. I hope that Aristotle would at least have had a drink with me, maybe even have been friends. I'd have paid, of course.
Perfection only exists in moments; it does not persist. Completion is a condition at war with itself. Disintegration, entropy is the rule.
As I've gotten older, I've found it gets harder to find friends. People are always occupied.
I moved halfway across the country to take a job here, just work, nothing glamorous. I am not the normal kind of person who comes to DC.
I'm not the normal kind of person, period.
Perhaps it's my simpleton Southern/Midwestern ways, but, while I wouldn't describe myself as terribly friendly, people aren't friendly here. I had a spare ticket to see Lewis Black at the Warner Theater a few years ago. I couldn't find a date, so I asked another guy who was milling around, obviously going to the show, if he had a friend who would like a ticket. He looked at me like I had asked if his newborn daughter was available and whether she was busy later. I meant no harm. If anything, I seeking brains and Ehrhardt South Carolina submissive hot Decatur woman fucking
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I have known this guy for about 10 years. In the last maybe two to years a group of us (him included of course) have gone out for meals to different restaurants which I found very enjoyable and looked forward to very much each month. I occasionally take a glass of wine with my meal as this is all I can ever tolerate. I have noticed this particular individual never took a drink. I did not pay any particular attention to this as I assumed he did just not like the stuff. I know his family back home so we would chat over the phone sometimes, exchanging news. About six months out of the blue he asked me would I like it if he became my boyfriend. I was really taken ignored the question and never brought up the subject again. I was embarrassed. I have never seen this guy with a girlfriend, it does not mean he never had one of course. So, I just assumed that he was a loner and that is alright too. A few years ago a at the dinner table asked him why he never married. His reply was "I never met the right one" this guy is in his early fifties. He is a good looking guy and I have noticed women start up conversations with him. He is polite to them but never forthcoming. We have not seen much of this guy since Christmas. Over the phone he was saying he was sick, had a cold, food poisoning. A few weeks ago he turns up at lunchtime reeking of drink and untidy looking. He was like a different person. A few years back, he did say he was an alcoholic. But, seeing as we had never seen him take a drink, it did not register. This is a hard worker and quite wealthy. You would not think it to look at him on a daily basis, but he cleans up very well indeed. I have not gone out for the meal this month as I really don't know what to say if he is there. I don't want to get involved with a person who drinks heavily. tonight come over and fuck meWhen things get overwhelming for me and the, when we're facing a third day of bring 30 seconds late for school, or things just feel like they're getting too nuts, I simply tell myself, and the, "We gotta do better". And we try. Tips: On your day off- meal plan and prep easy meals for the week. I'm sure if you're on, your kid gets free lunches at school which should help, so you only have dinner and breakfast to worry about. Go to bed earlier. Throw the wash in before you go to sleep, put it in the dryer in the morn before you go to work. Fold in the first minutes you're home that day right after you start your easy to make (cause you prepped it beforehand) dinner. Whatever you do, don't run yourself ragged making time for your bf at your kid's expense. Just do better. No excuses, just do better. sex lady
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