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Cypress swingers club push past your inner voice to try and really hear my voice w4w I don't really know what happened. I know we both have trust issues, but I stated that I was okay with that, working past it..that your life is truly your life to live however you want to.. But that I also wanted all of your free time that you could spare, just wanted to be near you even though I never felt like you'd let me as close to you as I really wanted..it did seem like you really enjoyed my company too though. But, then, you convinced me that I was IT before our few awkward, un-fruitful encounters. I was paralyzed because you made me feel rejected a few times before and I wasn't sure I could handle another..and I told you that, told you I'd need encouragement because I was afraid you didn't want me regardless of what you said via text..but, you gave me nothing to work with and then got mad at me for not just forcing myself on you! Or, that's how it seemed. And you say actions matter more than words, so you probably thought I wasn't madly, ridiculously, SICK in love with you even though that is what I said and continued to say but you just closed yourself off to me. I have to have comfort and secure feelings in just the words before I let myself be completely free with someone physiy. (and I was right on the precipice of that comfort with you I felt like we were about to make ALL of our fantasies come true but it seems you were already thinking about how to get rid of me.) And you seemed to be someone that would truly appreciate that about me. I've only been that close to ONE person..and I was very much looking forward to you making me completely forget that since you also made me forget about the women of my past that I thought were so incredible..they didn't come close to comparing to you. You pushed me away..then you pushed really hard. :( I'm so grateful we have mutual friends because I was sure I would not be able to handle seeing you again after all of that but then we were forced to be a searching for that special married someone
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"Am I loosing it?" Emphatiy NO. What you are feeling is percent normal. Everyone in a relationship feels trapped from time to time and your window shopping on certainly shows how you feel. Everyone, even the preachers wife, feels like you on occasion. don't beat yourself up for feeling normal. You might need to ask yourself some hard questions here. Things like, "Why am I in this relationship?" and, "What would I do if it ended?" Are you able to make it on your own or are you financially and/or socially tied to your BF. Do you have your own wheels and job? In other words have you painted yourself into a corner with this and despair of your own lack of independence? If that is the case you might be setting up bad situations with him because you feel bad about yourself. However if he is abusive either physiy or mentally, you need to do whatever it takes to get away. Your attraction to the idea of having sex with a woman be just normal curiosity that has nothing to do with your current status or you might be taking psychological shelter in the idea. Either way it might be a good idea to get some counseling. Best of luck to you and be careful. dont look at me now m 61533Basiy this would make it illegal to own a firearm any rifle with a clip or ANY pistol unless:.It is registered.You are fingerprinted.You supply a current Driver's License.You supply your Social Security #.You submit to a physical mental evaluation at any time of their choosing.Each update change or ownership through private or public sale must be reported and costs $25 Failure to do so you automatiy lose the right to own a firearm and are subject up to a year in jail..There is a provision clause on 16 section stating a access provision. Gun must be locked and inaccessible to any under 18. The Government would have the right to come and inspect that you are storing your gun safely away from accessibility to and fine is punishable for up to 5 yrs. in prison. dating activities
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