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if I can get all Savagey on your ass (so to speak) for a moment there's no such thing as a "gateway -" that's like saying "porn was the gateway that made me crave sex" or: "the missionary position was the gateway that made me want oral sex" if you're craving anal stimulation, there's lots of alternatives to being with a guy scroll back through this forum, there's lot's of regular posters who swear by pegging and prostrate stimulation with their female partners but, if you're curious about trying it with a guy so what? as as condoms are used and your partner is discreet what harm can there be? at worst, you can definitely decide for yourself "that's not for me" at best, you discover something you've been waiting for your whole life IMO, anything you do up to your mid/late 20's is experimentation/exploration ie, it doesn't define who/what you are there are some regular posters on here who didn't figure out who/what they really are till their 40's or even 50's (I'm pushing 50, and I'm still learning who/what I am) you've got years, decades, ahead of you don't waste them on being afraid (I seriously wish someone had explained this to me when I was in my 20's) good luck, f4f and I you'll report back! bbw phone sex for sexy 12589 guyI fully agree that I need counseling, my daughter gets counseling. I don't agree with the theory that I can't let him go. My theory that I have been kind of working off of, is that the sudden breakup was the WRONG move. So, We ease into it and let it happen over a bit of time. Kind of like getting fat. You don't notice so much while it's happening, then it's just already done. It's the same principle the abusers use. Gradual and over time. It's not ideal. I admit, but it has gotten him physiy out of my house without retaliation towards me. I do believe that that was the best choice I could have made, and if not, it's too late to change that. My initial need for feedback is because I am afraid of making the wrong move now and accidentally pulling him back in so to speak. My ego was destroyed a time ago when I started to irritate him daily, then all day daily, then anger him, then enrage him and I didn't even understand what I'd done wrong. Yes it hurts that the I thought he was I either drove out of him or was never real. It hurts that I was not really loved like I once thought, and that I never have been. But my attachment to him specifiy is dead. I don't even the same person I used to. It feels like the I thought he was actually died a time ago. I do want this gone. True thorough fear has has more to do with my actions and choices than anything. But you still have it that I need help. I don't know how to emotionally deal with all of this. I don't know what I am supposed to be doing that be the best choice for my daughters well being in the end. I can only do what seems to be the right thing at the time. Then, I can remain single as as she is still a. That be easy. Bitterness is setting in. couple seeking woman
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