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But only at first when meeting new people and then I'm fine. As far as the sex part goes, no, I didn't feel like women were in charge or I wanted them to be in charge. I would initiate sex. No, I don't myself as a bottom. I don't feel I need a or a woman to be the dominant one and me submissive. My sex drive is high, but I really need to be attracted to a woman physiy to have sex with her. I know some guys are just happy to be having sex and to hell with what she looks like. That's not me at all. Do you feel that most people have sex with someone even if they don't find the person sexually attractive? I've turned down sex with a few women. If a guy came on to me and I found him unattractive I couldn't have sex with him. If I found him attractive who's to say what would happen. I've never been intimate with a guy before. I'm trying to figure this all out. It's not easy. Everyone on here is making some very valid points. mature sex partners 85072But I think they're all useful for telling you something different about the person. I'm still trying to figure out exactly how they all work together, which is part of why I was curious to hear other people's ideas. So everything below is just a tentative stab at this. I think D tells you how a person relates to other people, the world, and to themselves. Do they take care in their relations? Is it about them, or are relations reciprocal? Do they prefer immediate gratification or do they prefer the idea of gratification (fantasy)? I think B is important, but instead of WHAT the person is drawn to, I think it is more important THAT a person be passionate. I don't really care if they are passionate about music, or books, or sailboarding, or rabbits. But having a passion, and not just wimpy likes, indicates that a person is ALIVE, that they life itself. I think C tells you what a person admires, and also what they think of themselves, as well as what kind of power relations they conceive of between people. Those are all really, really important. Do they respect themselves? Do they want to fix other people? Do they want someone to control them? E is the least important to me, although I think it can give you insight into the order of importance a person places on competing desires. So a person might think family is important as well as happiness, but if they forgo their own happiness to keep their family satisfied, then it tells you which they value more. A is completely irrelevant, except insofar as it affects the way a person gets treated by other people, and so it shapes them in various ways. But I think the way that shaping happens is totally dependent on all the other choices above, so those are the important ones. divorced woman
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