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mature dating Tucson both of you can't be leaders, nor followers. One of you has to choose to be the follower. In your situation, it seems to me you expect her to be okay with giving up her dreams to follow you, but you're not okay with doing the same to follow her. So your screenname "2face" is appropriate. It HAS to be one or the other for any marriage to work. Power-struggles are infinitely difficult to overcome when both of you are determined to be the leader. Not impossible, but very very rare. Choose to lead, and maintain what you've got now on the West Coast without her; or choose to follow her where she goes. It's that simple, and that difficult. sweaty teen Derry
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