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However I would like for it to be open to the extent that we can talk to other people and enjoy them, find them attractive, have conversations and flirt. AND remain completely true and loyal to each other. And be able to trust that to our bones. This concept is very strange to him. He is sort of black or white. He can only relate right now to having these feelings for someone and that meaning that something must be wrong between us and finding fault with me out of a conditioned guilty conscience. Loving like this is a I know it requires of both of us confidence, in our selves and each other. We have to be able to trust each other completely and feel good enough about ourselves to feel worthy of this kind for relationship. I believe in monogomay, and I believe that monogamy can also incorporate relating with other people and enjoying attraction. It just takes being very solid and commited and knowing what we are commited to and why. We both need to know of ourselves and from each other the value of our relationship as well as the value of staying committed to it and the goals that we are sharing. Personally I feel that as we grow in relationship that the paradigm of our turn-on should also. For example. for me, while I still find my boyfriend very attractive, the turn on facotr is no longer about the unknown, it is about the known, and about the beauty of what we are doing together and the sacredness of true intimacy. However this is also the bubble I find myself living in, sadly, alone. At least for now. I do feel that our paradigms are different in how we approach and relate to relationship, initmacy and marriage. I have a lot of lofty views on all this, and well, I have recently had to succumb to the relaization that right now, he is not floating on the same lofty cloud as me. Who knows. Sure just feels good getting this out. Thanks for listening
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and she is your soulmate, then you should leave your husband and be with her. Otherwise, you are puffing up a cloud of tragic romanticism. That's your choice, and it sometimes makes for good literature, but you are not actually being forced to make the choices you are making by anyone other than yourself. girls wanting phone sex New ZealandI don't know if you're spiritual or not, but I am. I'd like to share a bit. I've been through a fair share of trials in my life (nothing like yours!), and here's what gets me through: I believe there is some purpose for us after death, and sometimes here in life. But mainly, life is a training ground for that purpose. Those of us with the strongest souls and greatest purpose have to suffer the greatest trials to build that spiritual strength and learn the great lessons. And God wouldn't give us more than we can handle so if it's dished to you, you know you can take it and survive and one day, you'll know what it's all for. Someone, somewhere, benefit. In every trial, there is a blessing. Something to be learned or gained, even in the face of grievous loss or pain. If you look hard enough, you'll what that is. Sometimes it's for your own benefit, sometimes it's for someone who needs you. Maybe not today, maybe someday far in the future but be patient, keep your heart and mind open, and you'll find it. Every cloud really DOES have a silver lining. Blessings to you. free chat rooms for singles
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