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i can handle learning to love him to the part of giving up your vision of the future. When I first considered that I might be I thought of how alone I was going to be without not only an intimate relationship but without any friends, as well. I'm already isolated and being alone is a real fear of mine. Thank you for all your support, Nushka. It has been nice to talk to a friendly soul today when I am feeling so out of sorts. In terms of my original question, I think that I just cannot conform to the expectations that men or straight women have of me. I just don't fit in that scheme of things at all. Maybe with everything I have to deal with I'll just accept that for now as a working premise.
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