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a a total of 6 years, so I was used to being by myself, but when my ex and I split there was quite a bit of fear that something bad would happen. I had mace, a knife with hooks for your fingers so you don't cut yourself, and a taser all on my nightstand. My friends were even more worried, so my ex next door neighbor was always checking on me. I'm on a first name basis with quite a few of the in my neighborhood, which is a good thing because they can just laugh at me. Like the night I ed because I heard something at the window and it turned out to be a raccoon. Or even better, and this wasn't that ago I heard a noise and came upstairs, turned on the porch light and peeked out the blinds. Decided to stay up for a few minutes and smoke a cig. Next thing I knew there were two huge crashes on my front door like someone was slamming into it. I ed the, hiding in a room where I could lock the door, I was crying, they were staying on the phone with me until a car could get there. Finally I peeked out the window and realized I had just ed the cops on the paper boy. The noise was from where he threw the newspapers against the front door papers so they were really heavy. I took some razzing over that one. 45 yr old woman in mandarinI'll try to make it short: Married 2 years, DH lost interest in sex within months of the wedding, after so much rejection I quit trying to be intimate with him. We finally made it into marriage counseling but we had to change counselors several times. Our latest counselor has helped a bit. Our homework for the week was to decide on a day of the week to have sex. It was supposed to be last. He didn't want to have sex until after I was asleep night, so we moved the date until Wednesday but he was too tired. Thursday neither one of us brought it up. Finally today around 5:00, I was feeling frisky so I initiated and he said he needed to shower and manscape. We had to pick up our dog from the groomer by 6:30, so I told him to hurry. Around 5:45, he came to find me and had the computer. He wanted to show me this video about how to give an amazing blow job. I was excited about it until 10-15 minutes had gone by and he hadn't even found the video and our window for sex was shrinking. Finally, I said, "Why don't I go get the dog and we'll resume this later." He wanted to have sex right then. I told him I didn't want to rush and be worried about the time the whole time. He said he wanted to right then. I said fine and spent the whole 20 minutes feeling resentful. He said he wanted to talk about it since it didn't seem like I enjoyed it and I told him that I felt like I had to have sex since he's the one who basiy controls when we do it. The other issue is that the resentment over the 2 years of rejection has really made me lose attraction to him. He is a very attractive guy and I felt repulsion during sex. I can't say that to him, but is there anything i can do about it? Has anyone here ever recover from feelings like this? Is it worth trying? I know the lack of attraction from my side is probably a result of resentment. How do I let that go? Was I completely unreasonable to be upset about the sexcapade today? granny ladies xxx
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