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It seems to me that, for example, in a V relationship (one person in the middle, the other two don't relate), each relationship find its own level, but most likely one person of the two on the ends of the V be primary most of the time. How can you shoot for absolute equality? Humanity is not that exact. It just isn't. Another side to the question you are asking is this: What happens to the longterm primary when the middle person meets another new partner who is suddenly the priority? NRE (new romance euphoria in poly-speak) is a force to be reckoned with. Longterm poly relationships usually have limits, reservations, boundaries etc. to guard against the loss of perspective that NRE brings. If the first person was the ONLY person, therefore the de facto primary, it must be quite unsettling to suddenly be secondary to a new person. Poly is very, very complicated and tough no matter how you look at it, and no matter where you currently are on the triangle or whatever shape the relationships take. Mexican Springs man wanting black pussyActually, while a large part of this is probably hormonal, some of it IS in your head. There's a lot of different layers to a sexual experience, especially for women. One is the thought, "hmm, that feels good," followed by layers of increasing and finally the actual act itself. When you say you "lack the -", does that mean that you have no interest in even starting up a sexual encounter, or that you are having trouble reaching orgasm? Is the menopausal issues causing changes in your body (dryness, etc.) that are perhaps making sex less comfortable? Sometimes, though, the comes when you "fake it" I don't mean faking orgasms, etc., but just making the effort to engage, even though it not be a priority, might help the spark come later, in a different way, but there be a spark, especially if you are with someone you and trust. You be programmed to expect a particular series of arousal signs, and it be time to learn some new ones. A glass of wine to relax help. Also, look to your physical health if you are out of shape, not getting enough sleep, stressed at work, stressed with, etc., all of these can be contributing factors. Women don't give themselves enough slack in this department, and tend to think things are "their fault", but often, it's just real life making itself felt. Start with a doctor, but take a hard look at how you are treating yourself overall. Good luck and it get better. online singles
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