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just to add something to the mix here. :) While reading your posts, (which are always so articulate and thoughtful, by the way) what came across first to me is you are a THINKER. So, maybe the key to developing those social relationships that would allow for you to be friends first would be ACTION sorts of things while expanding your circle. Let me explain. It was easier for me, as someone that lived in my head A LOT, to maintain a friendship with someone I was attracted to by getting involved in something physical not just social/chatting stuff. Much to my husband's chagrin, who happens to be an amazing cook, I never took that cooking class but that could be one if you wanted to keep things light. Martial arts is another one my girlfriends would always scoff until I convinced them to come down to the studio I trained at for years and they met fantastic guys from all walks of life and just TRY looking all sexy and cool with sweat beads pouring down your forehead. :) That actually helped my perpetually-with-the-wrong-guys girlfriend make lots of guy friends one of whom, a dentist, introduced her to the guy for her. Fantastic story, really. In a nutshell, she was sweet, smart, cute as a button but really jaded when it came to guys and just having a dojo with "brothers" (who were protective and full of friends/advice) was a particularly healing experience for her. She ended up marrying the guy and now they both train at that studio. Super cute. If something more cerebral and cause oriented is your idea of action, I did get involved in humanitarian causes that were dear to my heart and that has a way of engendering friendship while still keeping focus on something besides romance. One in particular, a shelter for teenage runaways, was where I found a friend that I eventually dated for a year or so. Great guy. We weren't right for each other term but we are still friends today. There's my.02. you find that friends first situation. They are INFINITELY better. Should the relationship end, it generally ends on a MUCH more positive note. Oh! And the sex is better too well YMMV. :) daytime swinger party new Las vegasif i make an assumption, F_ADuck (since you've obviously made some aswell).. you consider yourself ok with women.. that's great, i congratulate you on that.. BUT just because you are ok doesnt mean that every guy is ok with women. To You, Doing the Approach is easy but to the next, he might find approaching a woman one of the most nerve wracking things that he could do.. He'd rather sky dive than tell a girl how he feels. do you get where i'm getting at? Not everyone is at your level.. so my services wouldn't appeal to you. but to the guy with approach anxiety my services would be just the remedy. i might be "overstating" the obvious about approaching, but the obvious is Easier Said than Done to people. example: if a woman is in an unhealthy relationship.. your obvious remedy is to "just leave him" but to her it's Easier Said than Done. as far as my quote about the married woman.. let me ask you.. is she not a woman? does she not have feelings? You missed the point here.. i'm saying that EVEN married women to be approached (*what a shocker*). so by this logic, Single women would it Even More!!!! Now, i've approached married women.. and they that i'm so honest with them. they respect it. i leave them with a smile on their face. obviously they're married so it doesnt go anywhere but you get the point. point is the approach is Easier Said Than Done, which is why i hold a Workshop on how to get guys in the right mindset for approaching. i actually what i do.. i dont think it's something to be looked down upon :) women online dating
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