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The narcissist's guarded detachment is a sad reaction to his unfortunate formative years. Pathological narcissism is thought to be the result of a prolonged period of severe by primary caregivers, peers, or authority figures. In this sense, pathological narcissism is, therefore, a reaction to trauma. Narcissism is a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that got ossified and fixated and mutated into a personality disorder. All narcissists are traumatized and all of them suffer from a variety of post-traumatic symptoms: abandonment anxiety, reckless behaviors, anxiety and mood disorders, somatoform disorders, and so on. But the presenting signs of narcissism rarely indicate post-trauma. This is because pathological narcissism is an efficient coping (defense) mechanism. The narcissist presents to the world a facade of invincibility, equanimity, superiority, skilfulness, cool-headedness, invulnerability, and, in short: indifference. This front is penetrated only in times of great crises that threaten the narcissist's ability to obtain narcissistic supply. The narcissist then "falls apart" in a process of disintegration known as decompensation. The dynamic forces which render him paralyzed and fake his vulnerabilities, weaknesses, and fears are starkly exposed as his defenses crumble and become dysfunctional. The narcissist's extreme dependence on his social milieu for the regulation of his sense of self-worth are painfully and pitifully evident as he is reduced to begging and cajoling. At such times, the narcissist acts out self-destructively and anti-socially. His mask of superior equanimity is pierced by displays of impotent rage, self-loathing, self-pity, and crass attempts at manipulation of his friends, family, and colleagues. His ostensible benevolence and caring evaporate. He feels caged and threatened and he reacts as any animal would do by striking back at his perceived tormentors, at his hitherto "nearest" and "dearest". looking for sex Glencross South DakotaI just do. I appreciate your capacity to be nice to virtually everyone. I don't share it and I'm sure it requires work and effort unless you are Buddha but it's something I really admire about you. Re: the thread. If the OP is engaged and this unsettled about settling down she should probably hold off on the engagement temporarily and might be too to get married. The "experimenting" sounds to me to be more about anxiety about settling down with one person forever and less about a deep conflict about orientation. This is just displaced anxiety. The OP and her fiancee both don't take the possibility of being with a woman that seriously so for the OP the fantasy is a "safe" way of admitting she isn't ready for marriage. I think the gender issue is just a distraction from the real issue of feeling pinned down and restricted by the engagement, pinned down and restricted by religion, pinned down and restricted by rules. Because the fantasy goes against all that it is appealing to the OP as a form of relief but I don't necessarily think women or a woman are appealing to her, just the fantasy. woman looking for sex
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