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Hi everyone. I have a problem. My husband's cat is constantly (and I do mean constantly) peeing on things. We took him to the vet multiple times over the past years and nothing is physiy wrong with him. He's just an ass. Our other two cats have never had this problem. It's ramped up considerably in the last few months. We've tried switching litter, boxes, putting the boxes other places, everything you could think of. Lately, because of other issues in the marriage probably, I've been blowing up over the cat pee problem. He pees on the hardwood floors and they are now wrecked in places. He pees in the kitchen where I cook and store food. He pees on the table that has been in my family for 30 years and my grandma refinished and gave to me when I got married. He pees around the litter box and ruined the area rug in that room. He ruined our mattress. He destroyed our couch that I barely just paid off. I came home for my lunch hour today and lost it because there was pee where I wanted to eat. I have had numerous fights with my husband. He won't give the cat up, or crate him or let him roam outside for any amount of time. He does clean up the messes but since he and I both work, sometimes neither of us can get to the mess in time before something is stained permanently. I try to make things his problem as much as I can because if I just quietly cleaned and didn't say anything, this problem wouldn't get resolved. I tell him what has been soiled that day and leave it for him to clean within reason (obviously if it's in the same room as where my plays or eats then I have to clean it and I do). He sees a therapist once a week for other issues. We did a two year stint in marriage counseling and things were getting better for awhile. I am constantly angry. That, and the messes around the house aren't good for our two year old. I've threatened to leave several times. It's embarassing to think that not only I be divorced and couldn't keep it together for my kid, but that this is all happening because my husband is picking a cat over me. He thinks I'm the selfish one, and heartless for asking him to rehome the cat. I don't know what to do. I try to be compassionate, I try to be a good wife. I'm not perfect. I tend to things in black and white. But I am at my breaking point. Am I being unreasonable? mature single and searchingdoesn't like it. He knows that your are your soft spot, so he is using your to try to make you feel guilty about your success. don't fall for it. Remember, you are the one who has been there for them. Unless he is a nutritionist with a detailed meal plan, how can he assess your meals over the past few years? That's another line of thought though. If you are missing anything, it is recognizing that he has a problem with your success and wants to make you feel guilty because of it. In my opinion, your are old enough that you can sit them down, ask how they really feel about it, and if there are problems to help determine what solutions might be including their active participation in the solution. (They are old enough to help with meals or prepare them entirely.) For instance, one life skill that can be important is the knowledge of how to cook. They might even have fun, make extra desserts, home made things, etc. Good luck. horny wifes
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