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i need help understanding what just happened with a new guy. we had been dating and getting along well and finally became intimate. the problem seems to be our relative sexual experience. i'm 22; he's 24. we hadn't talked about each other's priors but i'm sure i'm only the second or third girl he's slept with. as for me let's just say i've have a lot of guys, including a number of casual, immature, irresponsible hookups that i'm not proud of. i really like this one and he makes me comfortable in a way i usually haven't felt when i'm going with a guy. he's actually more mature emotionally than any of the guys i've dated and he's smart, good tempered, witty, and we really enjoy each other's company. we have conversations. after we started having sex regularly, one night i took the initiative and, without being too graphic, did something that i thought would be really nice for him and took my time and everything. i really got into it. at the time he seemed to like it and we had a great night. when we next got together there was something wrong and he eventually explained with discomfort and embarrassment on his part that what i had done and the way i had done it made it obvious that i had done it before with other guys. he couldn't help thinking of how guys i've been with. he doesn't i repeat does not want the details from me but he's somehow bothered by the disparity in our relative sexual histories. he's smart enough to realize that it's his reaction that is bothering him, not the fact that all that happened. but he's really mixed up and conflicted and tho he admits it is his issue, he can't seem to get beyond it. i think he's worried that he won't measure up to old lovers, which is ironic because a lot of the guys i was with before him were really lousy lays and he's actually great in the sack: patient, enthusiastic, loving—if anything he shows me how much experience does not matter at all. help! i don't want to lose him (at least over something like this). this has real potential. sexy chivette at gas station
Bottom line, you're depressed. There is no graph to measure how intense it is, but lack of intrest in regular activities is a red. If it continues, just getting out of bed or regular showers. taking care of yourself, good start is re-evaluating your self worth to build yourself up. Write down your greatest achievements, things you like about yourself, etc. Start planning your days based around small goals until you can rebuild your momentum. Lastly, surround yourself with friends and people who care about you, and don't dwell on conversations and feelings about your last relationship when with them. This lie a foundation for a new beginning. Best of luck to you. heavily tattood fat women adult hookupssit does not appear you have spoken with him how that phrase affects you; because of the way you and most people would interpret it. placing myself in his shoes, i can a couple of ways, that are not reflective of you personally, but how he sees things. some people, not, were raised in a guilt filled environment. they feel they are not worthy of the good things in their life. we only hear the words, but a better measure of a person is their actions. do you feel loved? i don't mean by his words, but is he considerate in the small everyday things/actions? is there a cultural aspect you have underestimated or overlooked? our culture sees this behavior differently than another. modesty is seen as a virtue by some cultures but is as a sign of weakness in ours even though we say otherwise. could your own possible feelings of insecurity only have magnified his words as you interpret them. well you can go by how some interpret (projecting their own bias) this, which only feed into your preexisting fears. if you can not broach this with your bf then this relationship is doomed anyway but not by what you thought/imagined the problem as. what do we know? we only what you tell us and that is highly colored by your own imagined fears. naughty dating sites
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