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that is why I asked. =) But I do think the trust HAS to go both ways. We hear so much about trust worthy Dom/mes but submissives need to be trust worthy as well, imo. I mean, the Dominant partner HAS to trust the submissive to some extent to safeword, or to communicate when that "line" is approaching. My D could never push me as hard as he does (and as I want him to) if he were constantly having to second guess my assessment of myself. Of course, he needs to draw the line for me if he truly feels I am taking risks that he isn't willing to take with me. And on the other hand, we wouldn't be where we are today if we both weren't willing to take some risks. Nothing ventured/nothing gained? Perhaps this issue doesn't come up outside the "boundary pushing" dynamic? I don't really know. Granger Washington Granger Washington slutcan a woman who has had a 'not-so-great/non-existant' relationship with her mother still create a lesbian relationship with another woman? i'm afraid i'll either pick someone like 'Mother' or maybe even end up acting like her. therapist seem to suggest that i need to take my place in the family hierarchy whether or not the woman at the top is accountable for her behavior, past/present. i feel like keeping my distance from unaccountable people even if they're relatives, and especially if they feel entitled to the top spot in the hierarchy without assuming leadership and accountability on the matter of emotional and psychological. it's not exactly like i feel safe knowing my needs in such a relationship are not likely to be met why even put myself in a position to have to "ask mommy" to meet my needs in relationship (as appears to be the "therapeutic" route: "relationships with our mothers are so -") when this real person has given no indication of interest in creating an open, direct and honest relationship? when what she appears to want is respect for her position of authority alone and that it is i who am accountable to her? i'd rather spend my time and energy creating relationships with people who are intentionally interested in such things but it's tough to make a decision to set that boundary with her so far out like she is just another person I know, and one I don't happen to want a close relationship with anybody been there? i appreciate your feedback if you have any free couple chat
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