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whatever it takes. If the visits are upsetting your daughter and your ex refuses to take the necessary steps to better herself, maybe the visits should be stopped for a while. This is something your daughter's counselor would probably need to discuss with the court, after speaking with your daughter, or I'm sure you can bring it up, too. Your ex is being extrememly selfish and not being a good parent if she refuses to get help and be a better mom. She ripped your family apart and it sounds like she's actually refusing to accept the blame for that (seems my earlier guess at the guilt causing the depression was wrong). The bottom line is you cannot help someone who doesn't want to help themselves, espeiy when the have the resources and the reasons (your -) to do so. Do what you have to do to protect your daughter, regardless of the cost to your ex. She needs to learn that she either gets her shit together or she loses out of being a mother. This isn't for your daughter. seeking discreet cougar
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