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"As as I have known him he has made up stories about himself and what he does and where he has been in life. Not huge, but still makes me not trust him completely." Then "Through out our relationship I have maintained a friendship with another, and husband thinks I stopped talking to him years ago but I know his number by heart." "I have not seen this friend in a year, but have tried several times to meet him in my home town just to be around some one normal. " "No job, no way out," Why don't you have a job for? You said you aren't with him when he travels on the road. "We don't eye to eye on most things, like marriage," Lots of couples/family members have different views on hot button topics. I can't/won't talk to my mom about marriage or abortion. Sounds like you got married too out of desperation, and regret it now. You think the grass is greener on the other side, which it or not be. Seems you are hell bent on leaving your husband for . "I send him, and he sends a sentence back maybe. I am pouring my soul out, and getting nothing, " ome cougars women funI can very clearly how you could think that. For the most part i was always in tune with her, on all levels. She played along.. she did her part.. She didn't seem to be doing anything differently that i could at the time.. Would have noticed the tears if she wasn't wearing a blind fold.. Some people can hide and control their body language very well.. Unfortunately she was in full blown hide emotions and act normal Needless to say she was a noob, she didn't do her homework as requested and failed to use one of the safewords.. I went over the safewords with her before we played.. It was safeword or the word red.. I did feel bad about that. I guessed I expected more out of a honors college student than just look at the pictures to the side Yes, i am to blame to an extent for pushing someone too hard too fast.. I made the horrid mistake of picking right off where i was with my last partner, who knew the ins and outs.. and wanted things to seem as real as possible.. that person only deplouyed the safeword once.. But she also liked to feel the full range of everything.. that same scene with a previous partner.. She wouldn't have cared if it was different guys.. Even if she felt being used and.. it was just part of the mental mind fuck that person could have handled.. Yes I did make a mistake It hurt me deeply something i remember quite well.. I did hash it out in my, how could i have not known something was a? how could i have pushed her that hard? but ultimately.. I won't hold too much blame on myself. I guess there was a moment of lack of trust.. on her part.. She figured if she would have said it, it would have not mattered.. The point is..if she wouild have said it she would have been untied and un blindfolded immediately.. All i couild do was hold her, and tell her i loved her, etc.. Same thing i did to my previous sub/lover after a super intense scene.. just to bring down the high etc.. just this time i was dealing with eatrs bbw sexy
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