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However I would like for it to be open to the extent that we can talk to other people and enjoy them, find them attractive, have conversations and flirt. AND remain completely true and loyal to each other. And be able to trust that to our bones. This concept is very strange to him. He is sort of black or white. He can only relate right now to having these feelings for someone and that meaning that something must be wrong between us and finding fault with me out of a conditioned guilty conscience. Loving like this is a I know it requires of both of us confidence, in our selves and each other. We have to be able to trust each other completely and feel good enough about ourselves to feel worthy of this kind for relationship. I believe in monogomay, and I believe that monogamy can also incorporate relating with other people and enjoying attraction. It just takes being very solid and commited and knowing what we are commited to and why. We both need to know of ourselves and from each other the value of our relationship as well as the value of staying committed to it and the goals that we are sharing. Personally I feel that as we grow in relationship that the paradigm of our turn-on should also. For example. for me, while I still find my boyfriend very attractive, the turn on facotr is no longer about the unknown, it is about the known, and about the beauty of what we are doing together and the sacredness of true intimacy. However this is also the bubble I find myself living in, sadly, alone. At least for now. I do feel that our paradigms are different in how we approach and relate to relationship, initmacy and marriage. I have a lot of lofty views on all this, and well, I have recently had to succumb to the relaization that right now, he is not floating on the same lofty cloud as me. Who knows. Sure just feels good getting this out. Thanks for listening girls look sex tonight Lithgowbut the attitude that went with it was rather telling. What's wrong with it? Well, since I'm dating butches, it reminds me of those surveys they do with 3rd grade boys, where each time they do it, they discover that an inordinate number of those little shits think that paying for dinner means you get to have sex. Money is boring. Money as a substitute for personality is just sad. I'm not looking for a "-". It's my nature to observe the world and analyze the input I receive. So, that could be defined as "reading too much into it" or it could be "paying attention." The last one who did it was profoundly mentally unstable as well, so I admit that it's a cloud over my analysis -OR- it's another bit of evidence that she's a wack job. I think I need to go back to insisting on dutch dates to weed out this type. online dating
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