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It's the first day since we met, that we haven't spoken. I'm so irritated and exhausted because I don't know what's happening. Mostly, though, I feel cheated and sad because this uncertainty is currently ruining something that I really FELT had the potential to go somewhere it was so natural, exciting, and the rapport was there immediately..plus two words: Insane Chemistry! It has all happened so FAST, and then took the serious turn. There's nothing to do but wait now. While I appreciate your calm, logical detachment..it also hurts my feelings a little. I'm not sure how anything is gonna pan out, but Please! don't withhold your affections from me too much. My heart is fragile but capable of tremendous tenderness..if only you prove deserving. I know I'm way too busy right now..but if things are just right, I might be willing to make some room for you.
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Our sex life at home. Well it’s not bad for the most part. When I started cheating, and while I was cheating, we were having the best sex of our lives. And a lot, we have sex about twice a day. But never any less than 4 times a week. So obviously I didn’t cheat on him because I needed more sex. But since D day he has really put the pressure on me to have sex with him even more. Like I said I have been giving him EVERYTHING he wants since D day and that includes sex. But now it’s almost forced sex, I clearly am not enjoying it but it doesn’t stop him. If I say no he just replies with “Okay then in the morning”. Have I created a monster? Underlying issue: My problem with him is that he is the most selfish person I have ever known. He is always thinking of himself, doing things for himself all the time. I feel like he has no consideration for me what so ever, not just since D day. In, before D day I had a break down, had a conversation with him on how I was feeling and what I needed from him to make me happy again. I asked for consideration, I need him to appreciate me and all that I do for him. By giving in to his every whim to smooth things over for the wrongs that I have done I think I have only boosted his need to be selfish. How do I get out of this mess??? My few friends who know the entire back story are being supportive of me, they don’t blame me for cheating and have actually said they were surprised it took this. They haven’t told me straight out that the marriage is over but they aren’t saying I need to work things out with him either. horny women 37096
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