222 w4m i know i said no. it was completely my choice and i don't regret it.
but even after a year and a half, you are everywhere. in the sad love songs i hear, in the happy couples that pass by my porch, in my teenage memories.
i hope you are blissfully happy with her-that would be so great. but no matter how rational and logical i am, i find myself imagining that you might be waiting for me, the way you said you would.
i'm not posting this for you to read or respond to. i hope i'm not the type to post these annoying, overly dramatic missed connections on CL (i.e. this seems somehow desperate), and i have no expectations but there's this odd sense of peace in making these feelings public. even if you never read it. especially if you never read it.
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Please do not rush into this! How you go about coming out, acknowledging your sexuality, exploring your sexuality, should empower you and your family, but done carelessly only cause term hurt. At 33 you have a lot of life left. I know from experience. There are good marriages and there are good divorces. Those who are unhappy should not make others unhappy. How you deal with your present situation either empower or damage your. If they you dealing with your problems in an honest way, they learn from it. Do you have any one friend that you could open up to and get good feedback and yet trust that person to not take it public? It is always valuable to talk things out with someone, especially someone who is non-judgmental and trustworthy. Therapy/consoling is a great tool. Do not seek a cure, but aid in resolving your own feelings. If your wife isn't interested, go on your own, you need to develop your thoughts, your feelings, and find the tools to express them. Therapy/consoling is very good for this. If you initiate therapy on your own, it be threatening to your wife, but it definitely be a way of opening up a discussion. Good Luck fit mature guy for full figured lady
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