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Since throwing out the big "d" word is how he typiy deals with is anger (literally, he threatens this at least every month or two and then goes and sleeps in the guest room to prove his point), I assume that he's bluffing. But who knows? Ideally I want our relationship to work, and I am willing to do whatever it takes. However, I am beginning to recognize the role that I am playing in this stupid cycle, and I'm not going to play into the manipulation and threats anymore. I really wish we could just sell this place and start over in more neutral territory. But since we live next door to his parents, brother, aunt/uncle/cousins, and grandmother, they would certainly NOT be happy if we let strangers move onto THEIR land. Building a home here was stupid. Our relationship was precarious from the beginning, and the decision to live here has made it nearly impossible to remedy. Sigh. And yes, I have posted this on the DIFO and legal forum. Sorry for being redundant. dating community de
My wife and I are caretakers for her grandmother in her 90's. She doesn't require daily assistance at this point, and when she does, we plan to get help. Right now she pays $ as her share of the rent. She gets paid about $1, by the state each month. She can't leave the house without us, so she never spends any money. Now, if she were a normal roommate, I would ask for of the household bills: rent, elect, phone, gas, and water. $ comes to less than this. But we also cook all of her meals, clean up after her, take care of her medication, etc. It becomes an emotional burden at times, and also a financial burden as well. What do you think would be a fair share for her to contribute financially? Any advice, especially from those experienced in this situation, would be appreciated. asian lady wantedI'm not a doctor, but I've suffered on and off from mild to severe clinical depression for years (since I was 11 or so). Having been through rounds and rounds of counseling, outpatient treatment, medication, group therapy, etc., (and with a close family member who's now a therapist, largely because of what I went through) here's what I can tell you: There are varying degrees of depression, and it can be caused by things: genetics, chemistry, feeling overwhelmed by life circumstances, prolonged grief, etc. Sometimes more than one factor is at play. In my case, there was childhood molestation, an alcoholic parent, loss of several people to murder and other tragic deaths within a short timeframe, by a teacher, etc. I had a double-whammy in that depression runs in my family, although we suspect it not have always been diagnosed (why didn't a certain great-grandmother ever get out of bed?). So, the factors for me where biological AND situational. Right now, you're focusing on your situation as causing your depression. But that might not be all there is to the story. Sometimes, people go so in a "down" state that the essentially becomes re-wired so that they CAN'T go "up", emotionally. This is where professional help comes in. It doesn't mean you're crazy, or weak or whatever other judgments you have about getting outside help. It means you have a medical condition that needs to be attended to. Would you go a doctor if you'd severed your hand? Because depression does just that it takes away a part of you and prevents you from living as a full person. beautiful women
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