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The abusive behavior during your marriage is still going on even though you're divorced., as I'm sure you know, is all about control. By ing you all the time he's trying desperately to on to some of that and you're letting him. don't!!!! You took a step in reclaiming your life by divorcing him, and that took guts, so don't stop now. Him driving by your house to "check" when you didn't answer is a HUGE tell! Putting on a show for your friends is fairly typical as well. It's purpose is to isolate you so you feel more dependant on him. And it's working. Tell him to stop ing you. Do you have? If so get them a cell phone that he can them on so he doesn't have to you. If he s your phone, don't answer. It's time for YOU to take control of the situation. It's your life, make it yours. If you do talk to him, don't cry. Chew on a towel if you have to but don't cry! If you do he knows he can still get to you. Would it be possible to change your phone number? I know that can be difficult but worth thinking about. Take the advice of some of the others and try to find new friends, ones that are all yours and support you (and not worry about his side of it). That all by itself can be very therputic. Just know that the more you pull away the more desperate he's going to become. It's the whole "it's gonna get worse before it gets better" thing. When he sees he can't control you anymore he'll most likely get more. Be prepared for that. We at the forum are here for ya, though. If you need to vent, build up some courage, or even confess something really embarassing, MOST of us are here to help and not judge. Good luck to you. Keep us posted! need someone to talk to thru hard timessay he put his freind as a benificiary on his. If you were starting a at work and getting married to the woman who enabled you to start said , who would you put as a benificiary? The maliciousness came later. After I did the balance transfer that took him to about -0- in CC card debt. That 15k is still at 0% interest for another 5 or 6 months, but after that . I have to write the SEC and give then my qualcom logs to show I was at work when certain trades were made on our account. My name comes first on the joint account so I am responsible. These trades that he said were an accident, when looking back they were of the sort that it is obvious he did them on purpose. Etc Etc. He did hateful things to start a fight back in Oct of 07. That's when he had himself setup and wanted me to move out. girls wants for sex
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