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The respondents to your post aren't trying to talk out of their ass, they are just relating their understanding to your situation. While there are states that divide assets , New York is not one of them. You are in an 'equitable' state and if you can prove that you always paid the mortgage, you have a claim on the asset that it is 'yours'. Because it was purchased prior to the marriage not exempt it from the normal 'division of assets' process. You indicated 'we' bought it, so I assume both names are on the title, but that still shouldn't be a problem in establishing equity, but require the decree demand a quit claim from your ex. seeking sexy ltr or fwbWell first I think I'd tell my mom that if she ever attempts to get between my and me again we'd be done having holidays together and there be one less gift on mother's day. But then I'd have to take stock of my life, because the person I've decided to is JUST LIKE HER. Overstepping her bounds and trying to fight MY battles and without my permission. OH..she's all that and a bag of fucking chips, she knows what's best and no one even me can suggest otherwise. Get this straight..YOU FUCKED UP. and you fucked up BIG TIME. You can't undo the damage your, yes YOUR actions have done. The cat as they say, is out of the bag. You decided to fight fire with fire for whatever reason, whatever justification, you chose to step in and become as controlling as his mom. How'd it work out for you? Would you rate this a success? The truth I have serious doubts that your marriage survive this, I think you have just crossed a line where your husband can no longer trust you. You have demonstrated that you don't respect his ability to handle this. That shit is hard to overcome loss of respect is DEATH to a marriage. It is the underlying reason they end be it an affair, addiction, apathy. You can not respect his mother..I think even he would understand, perhaps not really like it..but he'd get it but you've shown, and shown clearly, you don't really respect him either. You know what's good for him and you're gonna fix it. It's contained in your title how do I HANDLE.. You don't, you handle YOURSELF. You have a lot to learn, I suggest you start now by admitting you've really fucked up. That way your marriage MIGHT have a shot at coming back from this. divorced woman
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